i dont know how i went so long not noticing how selfish my husband is.  i asked him if his car was working and mine was not...it isnt...would he have me on the bus with 3 children while his car sat in a parking lot waiting for him to come out after work?  he sd prob not.  i am so done looking out for him.  i dont even want to go to counselling...im looking for a job so that i can take care of me and the kids...if i deciode to leave...this is his house...not mine....he borrows my ipod cause he cant find his own...i offered b/c i care for him being comfortable...but he wouldnt want me to use his...im so done....im going to take care of me and my children...not him anymore....i left a mess for my pastor about counselling...i dont think im gonna call back...im tired of being the only one who gives adamn about this marriage....he doesnt care.....i am truly sick of him.....5 yrs and im thinkin of divorce...i dont want a divorce...i feel i jhave no right...god put us together so i cant c pulling apart what god put together....but i do not want things to b the way they r....my husband just doesnt seem to think of me...doesnt seem to be in this with me...so i am not longer in it with him...ill continue to live in this house unless he asks me to leave, but im so done....i dont want to be his wife anymore...i dont feel like he treats me as a wife.  he wont even tell me what his grades were in school...i sacraficed a great deal so that he cld go to school and study and he wont even tell me his grades...hes gotta b kidding.....we r married in name only seems like