Wow, i'm having an angry day.  So much has happened in the past few weeks, i dont know where to begin.  First of all i started a second job at wal-mart for various reasons.  One so i dont have to deal with my mother bitching all the time.  Two, so i can get my mind off of being lonely and obsessing about my poor friend in prison plus obsessing about my ex.  Anyway the wal mart initiation is to leave you alone and that way you'll learn.  It's very frustrating.  They assume i know everything cuz i used to work there.  That was a year ago, i worked for them for 3 yrs.  But hey i dont remember everything.  I've been so focused on my postal job.  Now that i got that off my chest... I'm starting to realize my "best" friend isnt really a friend to me.  I've been real close to her for about 10 years.  Its been real off and on.  Like a relationship i guess you could say.  I'm starting to realize the more i'm around her that all she cares about is herself.  She is married and has a 2 yr old son.  She has been married for 7 yrs now i think.  Even before she got married to the poor guy she was cheating on him and still is to this day.  I am angry with her right now.  She doesnt know it but i am.  I'm always the one being crapped on.  She is always using me as an excuse to go cheat on her husband and i'm sick of her dirty ways.  She even gets emotionally involved with these guys and they always play her.  Sorry to say but she deserves it.  What has angered me the most about her is how nosey she is.  I used to not care how nosey she was as long as it wasnt with me.  She started in on me.  I told her in confidence about my situation with my friend in prison.  She couldnt keep her mouth shut and told a coworker of hers about him.  Turns out to be with as small of a town this is out of all people this girl she told is my friend's cousin's girlfriend.  The weird thing is that he's going to live with his cousin when he gets out.  Everything was going good between the guy and i.  No worries, til Theresa had to start the drama.  The girl she works with ends up "telling her" stuff about the guy i like.  Weird things, things that dont make sense.  Oh but Theresa believes her.  I could care less what the two of them are up to but they're both scandalous.  Him and i havent stopped talking.  He is aware of the situation thats going on.  I told him.  Why should he be in the dark?  I'm probably gonna tell him everything else too.  I just think it wasnt theresas place to say anything to anyone.  Her husband i can understand, but a coworker?  Where the workplace is nothing but gossip?  Cmon!  Thats breaking the trust between a friendship!  Thank God for my neice, she's a couple years younger than me, long story.  She made me look at things in a different perspective.  She told me, if Theresa cant be honest and faithful to her own husband, she wont be honest and loyal to me as a friend.  It's so true.  I'm just real taken aback by all this.  I hate how it had to involve a guy for me to realize how conniving and backstabbing she is.  She even tells me the girl she works with is a backstabber.  So why should i believe a thing that comes out of her mouth either?  I hate this.  I hate how people get entertained by screwing with other peoples lives.   All because they have insecurity issues.  I became more sociable again, but just got hurt by someone i thought i could trust.  But hey what else is new?  Im always allowing this!