Thanks for the support everyone! Another increase in meal plan today.
Don't know what I was thinking while choosing my meals for today...clearly I wasn't thinking. Some how I managed to put majority of my exchanges at lunch. When I first saw it I got pissed because I knew there was no way I could finish it. Well...guess what. I finished it! Bwahahaha. Felt like I was going to throw up (not purge) after both lunch and dinner. And then snack was late so I literally have no room in my stomach right now. I can barely move!
Oh. I think some of you would be proud of this...I admitted a lot of my anger and fucked up emotions (laughing at other people being hurt, etc) to my Psych. We spoke a lot about and he was wonderful. He explained a lot of things and said that he is not really surprised with all of my inappropriate behavior. Confused the shit out of me. He asked me to write a letter to Carlos (obviously not give it to him) regarding what pisses me off and then tomorrow we will read it and go over what things are appropriate and what are not. Man...I think he is going to be sorry to of asked me to write that. It is 6 pages long I believe and oh man is it filled with anger and rage. Think of combining all my angriest journals on here into six pages. Ya. BAD.
Immediately after we had a group called anger management. HAHAHA. sorry, I literally almost fell off my chair laughing when I found out that was a group of ours today! And my SW led it. hahaha. It was good, and I spoke a lot and listened.
I did write a note to my SW and she read it. She asked me to go with her during our time to go outside, which I was fine with. But as soon as she asked me my body tensed up and my anxiety sky rocketed. I figured I wrote something wrong in my note (or too much) or I said something wrong (or too much) in group. Clearly I didn't which is usually the case...but as always I assume the worst. We continued to discuss anger.
So ya...the whole day was about my anger issues. That needed to happen and i think it will be continued with both my psych and SW. Also spoke to Joanna today...actually longer than usual. That was nice.
xoxo
Don't know what I was thinking while choosing my meals for today...clearly I wasn't thinking. Some how I managed to put majority of my exchanges at lunch. When I first saw it I got pissed because I knew there was no way I could finish it. Well...guess what. I finished it! Bwahahaha. Felt like I was going to throw up (not purge) after both lunch and dinner. And then snack was late so I literally have no room in my stomach right now. I can barely move!
Oh. I think some of you would be proud of this...I admitted a lot of my anger and fucked up emotions (laughing at other people being hurt, etc) to my Psych. We spoke a lot about and he was wonderful. He explained a lot of things and said that he is not really surprised with all of my inappropriate behavior. Confused the shit out of me. He asked me to write a letter to Carlos (obviously not give it to him) regarding what pisses me off and then tomorrow we will read it and go over what things are appropriate and what are not. Man...I think he is going to be sorry to of asked me to write that. It is 6 pages long I believe and oh man is it filled with anger and rage. Think of combining all my angriest journals on here into six pages. Ya. BAD.
Immediately after we had a group called anger management. HAHAHA. sorry, I literally almost fell off my chair laughing when I found out that was a group of ours today! And my SW led it. hahaha. It was good, and I spoke a lot and listened.
I did write a note to my SW and she read it. She asked me to go with her during our time to go outside, which I was fine with. But as soon as she asked me my body tensed up and my anxiety sky rocketed. I figured I wrote something wrong in my note (or too much) or I said something wrong (or too much) in group. Clearly I didn't which is usually the case...but as always I assume the worst. We continued to discuss anger.
So ya...the whole day was about my anger issues. That needed to happen and i think it will be continued with both my psych and SW. Also spoke to Joanna today...actually longer than usual. That was nice.
xoxo
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