I can't stop cutting.  Lately it has helped me relax and be able to sleep.  I want to stop but I can't.  each day seems to get harder to stop plus the things that are going on around me.  My life is one big mess.  Lately I have been depressed more and more offen.  My family is not making it easy either.  there are times that I can deal with them.  I know that living with them right is a most but I wish I was on my own.  then again I don't know how things would be with me.  It maybe safer for me to stay with them.  It keeps me from really doing something worse than cutting. 
I really hate myself.  I don't value myself like a normal person does, actually I have no self value what so ever.  I don't deserve anything I have or get.  Its all much better than I deserve.  I deserve a person to have a relationship with or just to have friends that care about me or to have anyone care about me. 
I don't know whats wrong with me.