Pain

Most days are a struggle to get out of bed.  Sometimes I feel like there is nothing to live for.  I hate myself very much.  Everything that I do is wrong.  The pain I feel is bottled up inside me, I don't know how to release plus I don't know how or what caused the pain.  The only way I have been able to release alittle of the pain is by hurting myself. 
I have days that I want to hurt myself up to the point before I committ suicide.  I want out of my life.