I feel like I'm living in a fog.  I don't know where or who I am anymore.  I've lost myself, can't remember who I used to be.  I've become this shell of a person, you can hardly call it living.  Sure I'm alive, but not more than the most basic meaning of that word.  I breathe, I sleep, my heart beats, but beyond that there is no life in me.  I just don't see the point anymore.  I feel something inside of me, but I don't know what it is.  Whatever it is, it's tearing me apart inside, and I don't know how to stop it.  Do I have a reason to live?  If I do, I can't remember it . . .  And if I can't remember it, is it really there at all anymore?  Is there a point?  I can't see one, and I think I'm losing all hope of ever seeing one again. 

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

I have felt this way many a times April. Searching for a meaning in life will depress you, because there isn\'t one. At least, one an apparant, lifesaving explanation that people can truly see; you have to live for the little things. When you cannot live for those, you have to just live with hope. Live with fantasy. Thats what I do. But, it can be enough to tide you over until some genuine, tangible happiness is in your hands again.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I\'ll cut off a chunk of my hope,and give it to you. If you will hold it, and wait a little while, an \"after\" will come. Whatever has you right now, it came to pass, not to stay. You will probably get lots of answers to your post. I answered, right? This means people want to engage you. Make the connections. Surely being alone is not working for you. Go ahead, reach out. Hands are wating to take yours. You are not here to give up, are you? I did not think so. Go ahead. Chat with someone. What do you lose but your aloneness?
AprilStar
AprilStar

I don\'t know . . . I wish it was that easy. There\'s no hope left in me. This has just gone on too long . . .
deleted_user
deleted_user

April, we all feel that way sometiimes, I know I sure do. I have cirrhosis, my hubby has Alzheimers, and heart and kidney diseases. Basically I should not have anything to live for - but I do. Every day I get up and say \"I\'m going to make it through this day\" - and I do. I have my bouts of depression when I feel like you do, but I know God is beside me, helping me, or I would be gone. Don\'t spend a lot of time looking for a meaning or reason for life - when the time is right you will have the answers.
People here care about you and we want you to talk to us. You are here for a reason - we all are. Life has its rough moments but remember if He leads you to it He\'ll lead you through it.
Please believe me April - it will be alright. Keep talking to us girl we luv ya.