Let's see if I remember how this is supposed to go.. It's green smiley Monday, of course. I have so much to be thankful for. Like always, I want to start out with that I'm mostly grateful to have been given the chance to be my little angel Nickolus's mommy for as long as I was. My life was so touched by having him with me for those 7 months and 3 weeks. He changed my life so much, I truely don't even know if I'd be alive or if I'd be in prison if I hadn't gotten pregnant with that little guy. And it's because of him that I am a mommy once again. I'm so thankful that he helped me fulfill my wishes in having another little miracle in my life. I know I owe him in sending me his sweet little sister. So for this week, those are the two things I'm grateful for. Nickolus, and Jaycie. I love you both so much and I don't know where I'd be without having had you both. You both have made me so much stronger, wiser, kinder, and have changed so much in my life, for the better.  Nickolus-Mommy misses you so much my little peanut. You showed me what true love was. You gave me the chance to have it again and for that I am so thankful to you. I pray that you keep a close watch over your little sister and me, and protect us both. I wish so badly you could be here and help me with Jaycie and just be the precious little boy that you were to me before. But I know things happened for a reason.. I'm still not sure what that reason was, but I hold onto the thought that you're in a better place and you're still with me somehow.  Jaycie's being a little trooper everyone. She's so precious! It's funny when she stays awake and she looks all over the place. You can tell she can't see anything but she opens her eyes so wide and tries to focus on them, it's just hilarious. She's starting to stay up more and more and I'm starting to try and play with her, but there's only so much you can do with a 1 week old. All she really does is just lay there, but I enjoy every minute of it!