I had my first aquatics class tonight. It was fun. It was bigger than what I thought it would be. No one my age though... Mostly older women, some older men. Like, over the age of 45-50 older. So I was kind of a loner and had no one to talk to. The instructor that was helping me tonight was telling me how to do some kick or something and said "you know like I'm sure you little one does when they don't get their way".. I just kinda half way smiled and said yea... My little boy never got old enough to throw a temper tantrum. The only time he really cried was when he got his shots or when I would leave out of the room (when he was really starting to get attatched). It's so hard dealing with this in everyday life. I didn't want to just be like "oh he's passed.." and there be the akwardness and probably her asking what I said because she wouldn't of heard me over the splashing of everyone else. I had to order a new swim suit today because the one I bought last week was no bueno today. I bought an XL because I know how big I'm going to get, but the top is too big and it doesn't hold my boobs, it just kinda lets em do their own thing, and when I got in the water the tankini hanging part started floating up and I was so afraid of something falling out. And my bottoms kept riding down when we were doing the jogging part. I held my bathing suit for more than half the deal. So needless to say I bought a one piece this time. Maybe I should look into something more simple like yoga or something... I dunno!