Man yesterday was a killer for me. I went out with Michael to a TX Rangers baseball game. I had a couple of drinks, ended up getting trashed and completely lost it last night. All these people with their little boys were just all over the place. I was in the restroom waiting for a stall and this little boy opened the door with his pants around his knees and his shirt pulled up and all I could think about was my little Nickolus when he was naked... I miss him so much. Michael says I just need to accept what's happened and move on but I think that is so cold. How can I just move on from losing my son?? How is that even possible? God I miss him so much I truely don't know what to do..