first congrats on the new place Silvermane. secondly, I don't know your story but please try to remember this is a process of transformation and it will take time. Give a quick thought to where you came from and the progress you've made thus far. yes, the nights are tough, (so are the weekends for me since im off then) but it will get better. Keep rockin!

Yes I have a lot on this one! The process you refer to will end when it ends lol. There is no time chart, once you just let it run its course it gets better and better. I so wanted to just be done with thinking about him and got so mad at times when I wasnt "cured" and other people on here were fully recovered and never looked back and yet here I was and still partially am trying to just get on with it. I managed to travel covering...Turkey, Italy Egypt. Then I secured a really good job position with benefits and good pension. I travelled to L.A. did disneyland..went to Los Cabo...I bought a Condo I love! I am going to Cuba in March. I had gone on anti depressants and got therapy....which I am now off of and only have therapy once a month now. I have done all that in 18 months and you know what? I STILL think about him, but whats changed is its not as often and its not as painful and its not in a fantasy land like it was. Sometimes I still get mad (relapses I call them) because I know what he is, I know that I had cognitive diss big time and YET I still sometimes fall back and think oh it wasnt that bad....THIS is guy who completely destroyed me mentally with his cognitive diss...everything he said he did opposite of. My cog diss was making believe everything he did to me was OK. Just let the thoughts happen, accept its whats happening at that time and feel the way you need to feel and it will pass, for me sometimes I will have a 3 day bout of them and get freaked out that I am regressing but I come back out of it into reality that he is a piece of shit and always will be. I hope this helps!

I'm with ladytruee. I've gotten past it all a couple of times, but he keeps coming back into my life. One would think that I had learned my lesson by now and stop the madness. Today, has been extremely difficult for me. The weather is dreary and I feel so incredibly alone. I know that I have to feel in order to heal, so I allow myself to sit with the painful emotion and know that in time, it will get better. I know all too well about living in the fantasy land. Now he is with the other woman and I should thank my lucky stars that he chose her over me (AGAIN). I just had to laugh at that statement. I'm guess that I'm doing better than I thought. My head and heart need to come together and save me from the cog diss that we all experience. I've often thought if I could erase all the memories, would I? Probably not...