Women who Love too Much Community Group
WHEN BEING IN LOVE, MEANS BEING IN PAIN... This group is to help women through the journey of realizing they can love themselves. To help realize that they are capable of having a happy, healthy, whole relationship and break the cycle of abuse and heartache from loving emotionally unavailable men.
The first thing we must understand is that the solution for a fullfilled, serene and happy life is not in controlling a man, trying to leav a man or looking for a new one.
We must relay in spirituality to look Inside of ourselves for what needs to be developed.
If we are empty, we can just go around finding more emptiness.
Wheter in a relationhip or not first we must start by changing how we act before we can start feeling different.
Action may mean all that can be good to us. Like a walk in the woods, a bath with music and candles, going to see a good movie, Learning new skills, etc.
By entering into action a process of trnsformation starts getting to the core of our being.
This also helps keeping attention away from the hecktic Relationship.
Hugs,
Maria
We must relay in spirituality to look Inside of ourselves for what needs to be developed.
If we are empty, we can just go around finding more emptiness.
Wheter in a relationhip or not first we must start by changing how we act before we can start feeling different.
Action may mean all that can be good to us. Like a walk in the woods, a bath with music and candles, going to see a good movie, Learning new skills, etc.
By entering into action a process of trnsformation starts getting to the core of our being.
This also helps keeping attention away from the hecktic Relationship.
Hugs,
Maria
We need to fix the core issues that cause us to become addicted to men and painful, unsatisfying 'love'.
We need to fix our childhood issues, we need to figure out what unhealthy patterns we learned to cope with hardship as children, and learn new patterns of behavior.
We will know we are fixed when we started to naturally become attracted to healthy men, who can take care of themselves and unhealthy men no longer hold the appeal for us. We will know we are fixed when we can allow others to truly love us and show care for us and not run away in fear.
It's hard work to use all the efforts that we have the habit to apply in fixing men so that they can one day love us fully, into changing ourselves first.
Adressing our childhood issues might mean telling our story to a friend who cares and understands us, writing about it here on the forum, or keeping a diary, or even seen a thérapist. What stays unhealed tends to be reproduced in adulthood relationships.
I also beleive society puts women into a cultural role of caretaker. I have been judged by family and friends by the way I have been managing my own life after my divorce whcich took place in 2002.
It's been hard to set my own needs and interests first and before those of everyone else.
Frrom the book of Robin I know that this a necessary and salutary healthy selfishness, but it's hard for others to understand.
I am 53 and have two grown up kids who do not live at home anymore. I got married again and that lasted exactly two years. Before my first marriage and in between marriages I had other consistant love relationships. It is a choice that I have made to not go into another love Relationship again.
I am far from being alone, I have many friends, my work, activities and interests. I even keep a friendship with my second ex-husband with whom the love Relationship rather faded out.
I have filled my life with so many other things, in permanent recovery, and getting better one day at the time I thought it woukd be great to join this group to learn more and share experience, strenght and hope.
Hugs,
Maria