Women who Love too Much Community Group
WHEN BEING IN LOVE, MEANS BEING IN PAIN... This group is to help women through the journey of realizing they can love themselves. To help realize that they are capable of having a happy, healthy, whole relationship and break the cycle of abuse and heartache from loving emotionally unavailable men.
My parents often ask me what they did wrong?
What they did to make me feel so badly about myself?
Lately I have come to see that their indifference to me, and my children, hurts me.
They would probably be totally baffled if I shared this with them.
Maybe they just weren't the right parents for me?
They are a very close couple. I have an older Brother and he was always so much cleverer and better than me...I couldnt compete with that! I felt I had to however. It wasnt until my brother started drinking and rebeling that I got a look in I suppose, when I was about 12.
My parents also nagged me to death about having children, to make them Grandparents....then when I did they moved nearly 400 miles away and only recently after 27 years moved nearer me.
They take no interest in my children, they never ask us over. It always has to be us offering to pop round to see them. They are youngish at late 60's so are going out and about a lot. But sometimes they come nearby and dont pop in to see me?
and lately they have alsways been over at my brothers even though he has not been a good Son to them.
I know I sound petty and childish.
But their indifference is something that has just got to me lately.
I feel rejected and my children too.
I know they would be cross to think they make me feel this way.
I really dont want to make my children feel this way.
But when I left their Dad it worked out that they live with him and it scares me they will feel the way I do.
We couldnt sell our marital home for 5 years and I know the kids Dad wouldnt be able to pay the mortgage and the rent on somewhere else and he flat refused to leave the property. I left to rent a place just down the road and let the children stay in their home until we sold it ( didnt know it was going to take so long!) I saw them from 7am til 7pm. but when I needed to work full-time the kids Dad said they cant see me anymore as they are too busy in the evenings.. Which left me alone in my house with them down the road....., Along came assclown and I relocated as I thought I may as well live where he wants to be as I was not going to see my children anyway.
BIG regret that I did that.
I write to them, I call them and I remember to ask them when they are doing things...but I dont know what else to do.
What they did to make me feel so badly about myself?
Lately I have come to see that their indifference to me, and my children, hurts me.
They would probably be totally baffled if I shared this with them.
Maybe they just weren't the right parents for me?
They are a very close couple. I have an older Brother and he was always so much cleverer and better than me...I couldnt compete with that! I felt I had to however. It wasnt until my brother started drinking and rebeling that I got a look in I suppose, when I was about 12.
My parents also nagged me to death about having children, to make them Grandparents....then when I did they moved nearly 400 miles away and only recently after 27 years moved nearer me.
They take no interest in my children, they never ask us over. It always has to be us offering to pop round to see them. They are youngish at late 60's so are going out and about a lot. But sometimes they come nearby and dont pop in to see me?
and lately they have alsways been over at my brothers even though he has not been a good Son to them.
I know I sound petty and childish.
But their indifference is something that has just got to me lately.
I feel rejected and my children too.
I know they would be cross to think they make me feel this way.
I really dont want to make my children feel this way.
But when I left their Dad it worked out that they live with him and it scares me they will feel the way I do.
We couldnt sell our marital home for 5 years and I know the kids Dad wouldnt be able to pay the mortgage and the rent on somewhere else and he flat refused to leave the property. I left to rent a place just down the road and let the children stay in their home until we sold it ( didnt know it was going to take so long!) I saw them from 7am til 7pm. but when I needed to work full-time the kids Dad said they cant see me anymore as they are too busy in the evenings.. Which left me alone in my house with them down the road....., Along came assclown and I relocated as I thought I may as well live where he wants to be as I was not going to see my children anyway.
BIG regret that I did that.
I write to them, I call them and I remember to ask them when they are doing things...but I dont know what else to do.
I am a mother of a 7yr old and he is with me all the time and I still feel guilt. I think mother's guilt starts as soon as they cut the cord. We begin to question everything that we do, everything that we say....It seems it is never enough. Not seeing your children daily must be difficult.
I think being a WWLTM implies that we have or had parental issues, that is why we became WWLTM. You don't sound childish you sound wounded and I think we all can empathize with that, I know I can.
But still I worry I have damaged them by moving away....they are 13 and 14.
They lead such busy and exciting lives, Im so proud of them!
I write to my daughter and see them every other weekend, but my son plays sport nearly every day!
I wouldnt wish them sitting in with me, I have always told them to get out there and LIVE your life!
but still...ya know...I hope they dont feel I abandoned them, or chose him over them....
I give them my time and attention when they are free.
I dont know what else to do.
Its crippling me, I miss them so much.