Women who Love too Much Community Group

WHEN BEING IN LOVE, MEANS BEING IN PAIN... This group is to help women through the journey of realizing they can love themselves. To help realize that they are capable of having a happy, healthy, whole relationship and break the cycle of abuse and heartache from loving emotionally unavailable men.

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Dracona 01/30/2012

i wrote this for an assignment in poetry class. we had to be someone else's voice. i was my mothers.
lemme know what you think

JUST PART OF LIFE

I am your mother, you will respect me
I know I hurt you, but you should learn to listen better
You are beautiful. You are the most talented artist I know
I would like a picture for Mother’s Day … and you will sit here until you finish it
It’s finished already? It’s beautiful! Thank you! I can see how much you love me
Such detail. You’re very talented.
I am going to frame it

You are my daughter, my first born, the eldest
You will care for the baby like a good big sister, are you exited to have a baby sister?
I SAID SHUT THAT BABY UP
Get the baby out of the way before I step on it
You’re irresponsible, the baby could have gotten hurt because you didn’t listen to me when I said

Why did you tell someone I hit you?
I smacked you, do you want me to show you what it’s like to be hit?
After all I do for you, you are lucky! There are kids who would love your life and be grateful to me!
You are unappreciative.
I wash my hands of you.
You are not my daughter, I should have had an abortion, I should have been rid of you.

I’m sorry I hit you, let’s go for ice cream
People make mistakes. Its part of life.
It’s such a nice day outside.

NO?

Don’t tell me no!
Ill show you what the real world is like, then we will see how strong you think you are
Ill kick you to the curb
After a couple months you will come crawling back and be appreciative for what you have

A couple months…

Any day now…

So you never came back. We bumped heads a lot. We are too much alike anyway, we are both stubborn. just part of life

All grown up now and you still haven’t learned
You’ve made a mess of your life, things would be so much easier if you would just listen to me
Trust me, I raised four kids on my own with no help from anyone
You have to do what’s best for your daughter

Why are you always so negative?
Enjoy life. I don’t need this negativity in my life.
Where does this come from? Have you talked to a doctor about taking medication?
Why don’t you do something with your life?
You need a better job, Mcdonald’s is hiring, I picked up an application for you

How dare you judge me. Blame me for your life. All im trying to do is help you.
Stop living in the past. Every one has their differences. Its part of life.
You can’t blame me
That’s not even how it happened. You’re such a nasty person, who would ever want to be around you?
I wish you the best

Sometimes you have to let go of the ones you love, it’s just part of life.

deleted_user 01/30/2012

Darcona..that is very compelling. It is wonderfully written. I saw your other post about math. I can understand the struggle you have with math, however, I think your comand of writing should far out way any struggles you have with math. You go girl!!!

Dracona 01/30/2012

thanks immorg. problem is they require you to have math for a degree, ha.

deleted_user 01/30/2012

you can do it. maybe there is a teacher's assistant who would be willing to help. It has been forever since I have been in formal school so I am no longer sure how it works. However, I know the courage it takes to go back to school and the amount of strength you have already shown there is no way you are going to let a little thing like math hold you back. :)

Blueshoes2 01/30/2012

OMG! Your Mom is extremely immature and very incapable of taking any responsibility. It is amazing how thoughtful and introspective you are in comparison. But then I guess it maybe possible that situation helped to create it. Sorry, not meaning to demean your mom, just stating objectively what I am seeing in your poem. I used to write poetry when I was around 16...can't remember why i stopped, it was always such a good release. Maybe I will start again. Thanks Dracona, you have inspired me!

Dracona 01/31/2012

i had stopped writing as well, so i took a poetry class, im trying to be that creative person again. and i have an awesome teacher whom i really appreciate because he wants you to dig down deep into those events that have shaped you, and use it to create. i had hoped this poem had an impact. im hoping it can bring out the dark in me so i can finally let it go. it helps when you have a class that forces you to. ha .

maybe its cause my mother is a master manipulator, and i have spent my entire life trying not to be like her.
trying to make sure i wasnt like her... so i spent alot of time on small details... things that didnt matter. cant make a mistake. cant be like her. i spent so much time trying to not be her, that i forgot how to be me.... or never learned. now im finally trying to figure it out.

deleted_user 02/01/2012

Your poem is reminiscent of my childhood with my mother. Every single line of it is similar to my life. Like you I put myself through school while juggling my kids and working full-time. You are an inspiration.

I'm not sure what type of degree you are seeking, but you're right most require some math classes even if minimal. I love math but when it comes to creative writing...well let's just say that isn't my strong suit. I'm curious what math classes you're taking that are giving you trouble. Perhaps I could help some way...it truly is just the way you memorize it. Maybe the method your textbook and professor teaches isn't the best way for you to learn. You can do it though. If you can write that beautifully, then you can definitely do math.

Let me know what I can do to help. Consider it cyber tutoring! :) LOL

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