Women who Love too Much Community Group
WHEN BEING IN LOVE, MEANS BEING IN PAIN... This group is to help women through the journey of realizing they can love themselves. To help realize that they are capable of having a happy, healthy, whole relationship and break the cycle of abuse and heartache from loving emotionally unavailable men.
While going through a box of old papers I found a few letters from my ex of 9 years ago, who was very abusive. I read them, and it scared me... my recent ex who stalked me and just tried to kill my new guy and possibly me if he hadnt been there to stop him... had said the EXACT same things that this old letter was saying.
the manipulation, the love you hate you, the blaming, the guilt trip, the parts that make perfect sense. It was insane, i also noticed another similarity, the handwriting was also the same. you couldn't tell the letters apart. it was very eerie. even the poems they wrote me were nearly identical... talking about ancient times and how they found me... blah blah.
it was just too uncanny how similar they were, yet they had never met, and this was nearly ten years apart.
the manipulation, the love you hate you, the blaming, the guilt trip, the parts that make perfect sense. It was insane, i also noticed another similarity, the handwriting was also the same. you couldn't tell the letters apart. it was very eerie. even the poems they wrote me were nearly identical... talking about ancient times and how they found me... blah blah.
it was just too uncanny how similar they were, yet they had never met, and this was nearly ten years apart.
Im not suggesting that is the same for you Dracona!
My exes are very similar, my H now and the guy before him were peas in a pod - both RAF children, bullied, self-employed, both had an aspergers child. Both had been in a sexless marriage for 15 years but stayed and cheated. Then when they left they both have reported to me that their ex-wives were taking them for every penny they had. They are so similar. Even down to the speech impediment they both had as children.
Not sure what that says about me. How bizarre.
Anyway, its all growth , right.
Learning from the past is the healthiest way. I know Finn got frustrated with me for making the same old mistakes and not realising that! But Im getting it now.
Why is is that we go in circles? I think we stop when we are ready to face the painful truth and after that, make the decision to trust ourselves and choose differently. We have to see these patterns so we know what to avoid. Then when someone else comes along who pushes all the right buttons and we feel so attracted to, we have to say no.
Take care, Dracona. X I hope this new guy is good for you
My current relationship is going well, im just trying to deal with the ptsd crap and numbness, but he is a kind person. and he is permanently hurt because of this altercation. he was disabled from the marine core for taking a fall off a cliff and landing on his back and breaking other things, and well, being hit by a car... now there are chunks taken out of his spine. and he still walks around and plays with the kids like its he hasnt a care in the world.
Glad to hear your relationship is going well. That's awful to hear about his spine...again I hope your ex is put to justice.