Women who Love too Much Community Group
WHEN BEING IN LOVE, MEANS BEING IN PAIN... This group is to help women through the journey of realizing they can love themselves. To help realize that they are capable of having a happy, healthy, whole relationship and break the cycle of abuse and heartache from loving emotionally unavailable men.
MY DEAD BEAT DAD GOT NAILED TODAY.
ok.... so im trying not to feel smug.... but hell, i cant help it. it feels good. it felt good. keep in mind he has NEVER seen my 5 month old daughter.and ABANDONED us when i was 3 months pregnant. and even after i got over the fact he left, wouldnt even meet me for lunch for a half hour a week to talk about our daughter. and make plans. everything had to be the hard way.
we went to court for our parenting plan/child support. i had to hire a lawyer, because he did and refused to speak with me.... like i could afford one but i found one last minute. luckily she agreed to accept payments. well, after all his threats of harrassment after me calling him, twice in the past few months, and his know it all controlling self,
he got nailed for MY attorneys fee's, in the amount of 1200. and has to pay me back day care in the amount of 750. and monthly child support amount with day care imputed is 719, and back pay is about 3,000. his own lawyer fee's were about 1500. oops. thats almost, or is more than 5,000 bucks. HA HA HA.
his excuse for not seeing her was that, his exact words, "i had threatened him" that he could not see his daughter if he couldnt complete a parenting class..... and said his navy schedule was too hectic to allow time for that. and he hasnt visited her yet because he has been to busy at work. said he was going out to sea next week and didnt even want to start visitations till december. the judge ordered him to see her once, this week, before he goes out to sea. lol. oops. someone cant use the navy excuse any more.
and he has to have 8 consecutive visits within one month, and complete a parenting class before he can have any unsupervised time with her. and the judge said, you will not just feed her, you will play with her, make eye contact with her, and interact with her.
i feel like a big weight got lifted. and the look on his face when the judge awarded him the fee's.
it was GREAT.
in the hall, i was being civil... in front of his cheif. i looked at him, and asked if he wanted to see a picture or a video.... he said "i just cant right now... ill see her when i have to"
he deserved everything he got. he has put us through hell. he wasnt there at all. through my surgery, through her birth, when i was left alone in the hospital... NONE of it. he so deserved it. he folded and agreed to the child support amount, after lawyer battles, but ya know, i dont expect him to ever step up to the plate to see her.
money is the only thing that hurts him. and he got stuck good.
ok.... so im trying not to feel smug.... but hell, i cant help it. it feels good. it felt good. keep in mind he has NEVER seen my 5 month old daughter.and ABANDONED us when i was 3 months pregnant. and even after i got over the fact he left, wouldnt even meet me for lunch for a half hour a week to talk about our daughter. and make plans. everything had to be the hard way.
we went to court for our parenting plan/child support. i had to hire a lawyer, because he did and refused to speak with me.... like i could afford one but i found one last minute. luckily she agreed to accept payments. well, after all his threats of harrassment after me calling him, twice in the past few months, and his know it all controlling self,
he got nailed for MY attorneys fee's, in the amount of 1200. and has to pay me back day care in the amount of 750. and monthly child support amount with day care imputed is 719, and back pay is about 3,000. his own lawyer fee's were about 1500. oops. thats almost, or is more than 5,000 bucks. HA HA HA.
his excuse for not seeing her was that, his exact words, "i had threatened him" that he could not see his daughter if he couldnt complete a parenting class..... and said his navy schedule was too hectic to allow time for that. and he hasnt visited her yet because he has been to busy at work. said he was going out to sea next week and didnt even want to start visitations till december. the judge ordered him to see her once, this week, before he goes out to sea. lol. oops. someone cant use the navy excuse any more.
and he has to have 8 consecutive visits within one month, and complete a parenting class before he can have any unsupervised time with her. and the judge said, you will not just feed her, you will play with her, make eye contact with her, and interact with her.
i feel like a big weight got lifted. and the look on his face when the judge awarded him the fee's.
it was GREAT.
in the hall, i was being civil... in front of his cheif. i looked at him, and asked if he wanted to see a picture or a video.... he said "i just cant right now... ill see her when i have to"
he deserved everything he got. he has put us through hell. he wasnt there at all. through my surgery, through her birth, when i was left alone in the hospital... NONE of it. he so deserved it. he folded and agreed to the child support amount, after lawyer battles, but ya know, i dont expect him to ever step up to the plate to see her.
money is the only thing that hurts him. and he got stuck good.
I can sympathise with how stressful court is, I was in court last year, dylan's dad took me for 50/50 shared care of him and the dog, yes the dog, lol. he got 2/3 weekends but now... he only wants one night a week as he is "not having a life"
The thing to remember is never badmouth their dad's in front of the kids, and try to support a relationship where feasible.
Kids always know who was there for them...
so happy for you
xx
Im glad you and your little one got what you deserve!!! yeay!!! :)
When in the middle of this pain, it's sometimes hard to relax and trust that God, or the Universe, or whoever you hold as your higher power is working behind-the-scenes to make it all work out. People who do bad things will have to deal with that at some point... It's just how it is.
When stressed and hurting, we all can remember your story and know that justice does come. It may not be on our schedule, but it will happen. I'm glad that your finances will be easier now.. Yes. Celebrate!
Also, I just wanted to say how sorry I was that you were left alone in the hospital. I hope you other systems of support in place (like friends or family), not that would make up for the father not being there, but I am sure that had to feel like a huge abandonment (or it would have to me) and a very scary and lonely place to be alone in the world with a new born. I commend you for your strength and for taking good care of your daughter and yourself regardless of the outside circumstances.