Women who Love too Much Community Group
WHEN BEING IN LOVE, MEANS BEING IN PAIN... This group is to help women through the journey of realizing they can love themselves. To help realize that they are capable of having a happy, healthy, whole relationship and break the cycle of abuse and heartache from loving emotionally unavailable men.
I've read part of this book before but wanted to read it again. The Emotionally Abusive Relationship by Beverly Engel. This is from pg 12.
"The primary effects of emotional abuse on the the victim are depression, lack of motivation, confusion, difficulty concentrating or making decisions, low self-esteem, feelings of failure or worthlessness, feelings of hopelessness, self-blame, and self-destructiveness. Emotional abuse is like brainwashing in that it systematically wears away at the victim's self-confidence, and self-concept. Whether it is by constant berating and belittling, by intimidation, or under the guise of "guidance"or teaching, the results are similar. Eventually, the recipient loses all sense of self and all remnants of personal value."
Examples of Emotional Abuse (pg 11-12):
Humiliation and degradation
Discounting and negating
Domination and control
Judging and criticizing
Accusing and blaming
Trivial and unreasonable demands or expectations
emotional distancing and the "silent treatment"
isolation
Some behaviors of emotional abusers:
Withholding of attention or affection
Disapproving, dismissive, contemptuous, or condescending looks, comments or behaviors.
Sulking and pouting
Projection and/or accusations
Subtle threats of abandonment (either physical or emotional)
Emotional abuse is not only made up of negative behaviors but negative attitudes as ell. Therefore, we need to include the work attitude in our definition of emotional abuse. A person who is emotionally abusive need not take away any overt action whatsoever. All he or she needs to do is to exhibit an abusive attitude. Here are some examples:
Believing that others should do as you say
Not noticing how others feel
Not caring how others feel
Believing that everyone else is inferior to you
Believing you are always right
This all fits with me. Those last examples of what he/she feels like is also right on the money. I can see him believing all the above.
I've felt this description on the top is right on for me, has been for a long time and even tho I've only been out of this relationship for just over a month now I still feel this way most of the time. Still trying to find my own path and journey in this life that's going to make me happy. Just thought someone else may benefit from this information.
"The primary effects of emotional abuse on the the victim are depression, lack of motivation, confusion, difficulty concentrating or making decisions, low self-esteem, feelings of failure or worthlessness, feelings of hopelessness, self-blame, and self-destructiveness. Emotional abuse is like brainwashing in that it systematically wears away at the victim's self-confidence, and self-concept. Whether it is by constant berating and belittling, by intimidation, or under the guise of "guidance"or teaching, the results are similar. Eventually, the recipient loses all sense of self and all remnants of personal value."
Examples of Emotional Abuse (pg 11-12):
Humiliation and degradation
Discounting and negating
Domination and control
Judging and criticizing
Accusing and blaming
Trivial and unreasonable demands or expectations
emotional distancing and the "silent treatment"
isolation
Some behaviors of emotional abusers:
Withholding of attention or affection
Disapproving, dismissive, contemptuous, or condescending looks, comments or behaviors.
Sulking and pouting
Projection and/or accusations
Subtle threats of abandonment (either physical or emotional)
Emotional abuse is not only made up of negative behaviors but negative attitudes as ell. Therefore, we need to include the work attitude in our definition of emotional abuse. A person who is emotionally abusive need not take away any overt action whatsoever. All he or she needs to do is to exhibit an abusive attitude. Here are some examples:
Believing that others should do as you say
Not noticing how others feel
Not caring how others feel
Believing that everyone else is inferior to you
Believing you are always right
This all fits with me. Those last examples of what he/she feels like is also right on the money. I can see him believing all the above.
I've felt this description on the top is right on for me, has been for a long time and even tho I've only been out of this relationship for just over a month now I still feel this way most of the time. Still trying to find my own path and journey in this life that's going to make me happy. Just thought someone else may benefit from this information.
goingup
Thank you for sharing this information. Though my ex is out of my life, I still live with my parents (I'm a student) who treat me in abusive ways. Like yesterday I got a phone call for a job interview and I was all happy and they were like: well how many hours a week did you want? And I said "about 15" and they were like: why so little?. They could have congratulated me for getting an interview, but no, they turned it into a way to attack me.
deleted_user
The last 4 years of my marriage this was all I got....and I mean all of it. Every thing listed was my daily life. Sorry...realized I don't want to share any more of it on this open forum. Might right a journal entry later.
Join the Conversation