I'm with you Dracona. I was approached by a man on this site claiming to be from my state. For those who are using an actual picture of themselves, use caution. When I first joined I had a picture of myself until I realized that I could Google my username and low and behold... there was my face for the entire world to see along with my personal thoughts. Lesson to self... your username should not be easily identifiable.

I just changed my settings to be more private. Thanks for the warning!

Would agree for more security! Thanks Dracona.

Another Suggestion: www.intherooms.com

XX R

HI Dracona, this is a difficult operational problem and wont be easy to resolve! I do caution anyone with a really obvious name and personal photo to think about changing them, I know its a horrible world out there in cyber-space but you really do not want your most emotional and vulnerable thoughts manipulated by goodness knows who for goodness knows what! Similarly you should deliberately be vague and non specific about where you live, and any other potentially identifiable information on open sites such as this. I know we all want to be authentic with each other and we are, but we must also protect ourselves and our families from any rebounds from our postings.
Rivanta - the site you are suggesting, or indeed any 'chatrooms' are notoriously trolled by all sorts of awful people who take a perverse delight in pretending to be what they are not and disrupting chats with obscene rubbish. So in my opinion chat-rooms are not the answer either.

(((((((((Hugs to all))))))))))))2butterfly

I would like to have a private chat available, with weekly meetings or such since we do have such a large group now. but i just dont know what to do about this, we are such a good group together, but i really dont like that anyone can just google your info and it is posted all over the internet, including posts. you can change your settings to private, but it still shows some of your stuff. maybe we will just stay here, im just lookin to see what everyone wants to do, i know the site has gotten better with profile settings. i just think this should be a closed group that not just anyone can join.

Dracona,

I recently designed a web site with a free platform...You don't really need to buy a domain name nor a software to build the web site.
Once you got the site, it gets easier to add a chat room with HTML. If you're the owner or admin then you could password protect the site as well.
This is the platform to build the site: weebly.com (The platform got a friendly user interface and the support is for free)
and the link to build a free chat room is http://www.99chats.com/
you can also add a place where to post threats...just like DS

Let me know if you need any other than this.

DS doesn't do enough to protect against trolls. About a month back there was a troll on the rape support group, writing things like, "rape victims are asking for it' and it took DS admin a **week** to figure it out. By that time many people were writing they were traumatized. As far as I could tell this person was never even removed from the system and had been trolling more than one group.

I do worry about my ex finding some of my older posts and figuring out its me. But he would have to friend me to get personal information, and then all he could really find out is what state I'm living in. I'm really cautious about who I friend...I have turned down a few friend requests from people I didn't know and even deleted some that I never talk to just for security reasons.

I think it would be a good experiment to set up a group somewhere more secure and see where it goes. You do what you think is best Dracona :)

I am down for whatever works. This site works fine for me. I don't trust everyone and having a picture is a No No. Thanks for the warning! Friends just don't leave me (need the support).

Thanks

Mine is private except for friends also. I have not received any scammer trying to contact me. Thank goodness. My picture is on FB it's the world wide web. Anyone who googles my name will see my pic.

I have my profile closed apart from friends. I also made sure I used a name I had not used anywhere else, like ebay , fb etc as well as a picture that was also previously unused by me. I haven't been contacted by any scammers and I have found the women on this board tremendously supportive and an absolute gold mine of information and insight and support.

During my outright panic a couple of weeks ago when I found a lump under my arm, this was where I came and I was helped so much, you know who you are and I thank you deeply :) x

I think increased security is a great idea but how would any newbies find us .............it is relatively easy on DS to find this group. Every woman who reads WWLTM needs a support group as it's listed as part of the recovery process. (Personally, I think WWLTM book should be given out in schools - LOL ) I am all in favour of moving this group as long as it's secure and doesn't become unavailable to those who really need it. It's your group Dracona, I think you should have the final decision, along with the *senior members* and by that I don't mean old - LOL

Dracona, I will go wherever all you beautiful kindred spirits go.

I was contacted by a couple of people early on when I used my personal picture but quickly figured out what they were up too! Since then I've upped my security and took the picture down. I still don't like that you can google things posted on this board and anyone in the world can read them. I would hate to see this forum go away as it's provided me with so much support in the few months I've been on it. All of the women on here are wonderful and I would definitely move to the new site if you changed it.

I feel I won't be able to share what I really need to if I know that anyone can read it. Let me know where we move to. Thanks.

Yah, its not so much the profile security, but the group security. i like how we have all come together here, but i do not like that anyone can read our posts. the profile security is fine... ill look around and see what we can do. im also afraid of if we move, that not everyone will get the message to move. and newbies will find us. we can still advertise as we go. but i do agree this group is a lifesaver and i dont want it to change.