misselmos please remember that he has not changed. All the things you did not like about him are still there. He will treat her just as bad. She could be anybody and you can be sure that he will cheat on her just like he cheated on you. Try to follow the story all the way thru. You are concentrating on just the beginning. Remember all the reasons why you went no contact. Write them down and read them.

Do whatever you can to change your thoughts. Go outside for a walk. Call a friend who knew what a creep he was to you. write write and write more. Get those terrible thoughts out of your mind. You are beautiful! You deserve to be happy and you are not willing to settle anymore!! Picture yourself in a cage. He keeps you there. You can get out and be free now. When you think about him you stay in that cage. Open the door and be free. You deserve and want to be happy not caged in darkness.

I hope this helps. Sending big big ((((((( hugs)))))).

Misslemos, this is a really difficult time, I understand hon. Even when YOU are the one who has ended the relationship it is difficult when your former partner gets a new partner--we feel like we have been abandoned, and it is a really bad feeling!

There is someone out there who will love and appreciate you for who you are. If you remain hooked on this man who did NOT appreciate you, then you will not open up the door for someone who will.

Be gentle to yourself. Things will get better. Connect with friends. If you can, see a therapist who you can talk about this to. You need a lot of support right now.

I'm sending positive thoughts and energy to you right now! Lots of love and a BIG HUG.

ahhhh, I'm so sorry for you pain and your tears, let them all out, have a good cry. Do whatever you need to do to release all of the built up pain. As hard as this is, maybe it's time to let go and look forward. I know, easier said than done but the more you dwell on the past, the harder it is to cope. I think rejection is a really hard thing to accept and to heal from. My ex left in Feb (but not for a girlfriend as far as I know) so I know your pain. It is the worst thing ever. Here are a couple of quotes that I hope will touch your heart and give you some relief. Just know that many of us have been where you are right this very second. We are here for you, please be kind to yourself and take care of you:


No matter how bad it hurts or how bad you feel, it’s time to stop thinking about that person who played with your feelings, who took your love for granted, who never appreciated your care, who wasn’t contented with what you could give him or her. You can’t stay at that hurtful place anymore. You can’t keep shedding tears over someone who doesn’t deserve the love you gave. You can’t keep feeling sorry for yourself and thinking if only you did more. You can’t make them want the relationship because if they wanted they wouldn’t have let go of you.
You deserve better now. You deserve someone who appreciates you and who won’t play with your delicate heart.. Just like a cut on your hand will take time to heal, your broken heart needs time to heal as well. That’s not the end of your life. You will get over that pain you’re having right now and one day you’ll be happy again.
Orebela Gbenga quotes


“Sometimes you just have to turn the page to realize there’s more to your book of life than the page you’re stuck on. Stop being afraid to move on. Close this chapter of hurt, and never re-read it. It’s time to get what your life deserves, and move on from the things that don’t deserve you. Don’t try to fix what’s been broken in your past, let your future create something better.”
— Trent Shelton

Sending you many, many hugs!!!!!!!!!!

I understand completely. I told my ex who I was with for 12 yrs I needed to move on, and four months later I found out on FB he was in a relationship. And he and I were still in contact then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, he stopped talking to me and now I know why. It hurts no matter who does the leaving. And I have been NC for 9 months now, but let me tell you, 9 months ago I wanted to die. The weekend I found out all of this I wanted to die. Months afterwards I wanted to die. I had to go on antidepressants. So yeah, it sucks majorly. And it's gonna suck for awhile especially if you feel abandoned or rejected. Think about that too- is it him you want back or is it the pain from being abandoned and rejected for someone else.

Whatever you do, do not die, not over him. Because believe me, in time you will not even believe you wanted to die over him at all! Sending you hugs!

So sorry you are hurting. Social media can be so destructive - that is why i have closed my FB account to stop me looking at things that are going to hurt me even more. Remember this woman has to live with the knowledge that he cheated on you with her. She knows he has the capability of cheating. That will always be in the back of her mind. She might be feeling like the cat that got the cream right now but one day who is to say that she is going to be in a very different place. One day you will thank her for taking him off your hands. Not easy to think that right now as you are raw. If you were with him could you ever trust him again? Give your self lots of TLC and be kind to yourself.. Sending hugs too.

How are you doing? Keep writing. Tell us how you are feeling today? We can say stuff that might help. It's amazing how this site works also. Worrying about you or someone else on this site helps me! I don't think about my silly problems so much then. I can be of use to someone else and that makes me feel good!

Shani, this is being a very tough week, I feel very small and discarted, I cant stop thinking about them together, I look at the gf pic and I compare myself to her, she is younger, prettier, wth, she is very pretty and this makes me feel even worse.
I need to get out of where I am, I just dont know how.