When my boyfriend was in the academy it was really rough. It is a demanding time for them, both physically and emotionally. The best thing I found was being 100% honest. I told my boyfriend that I wasn't happy. That I needed to see him more to feel like he was really part of this relationship. As a result we set a date night. Sometimes our date nights consisted of him writing reports while I read a book, but just being in the same room was oddly comforting and helpful. If you guys are far apart maybe you could skype a few times a week. It's not always going to be everything you need, but it'll make things a little easier to cope with.

I am in the same situation, just a little behind on the timeline in that he is just starting his training. Nevertheless, I am really struggling and finding the whole thing quite overwhelming- I was previously with someone who worked in London full time and then did door-work in clubs during the evenings and nights- obviously that didn't work well for me!
I refuse to be 'her indoors' and just don't see how we could ever have a 'modern relationship' with a house together & children while he is working as a Police Officer.
I was honest about my concerns but also know how much he has wanted this, So for months now it's all we have been doing- so much 'role play' (not the fun kind!) writing interview questions, revising everything and maths tutoring to help him be successful. So I find it all very bittersweet that for me he is not someone I can see a lasting future with.
It all gets too much when people give their experiences and what went well/what went wrong (mostly wrong!). I don't hear many positive experiences from the partners of police women, and rarer to speak to someone who's relationship has lasted.