My husband is a long time alcoholic who due to several spinal surgeries became addicted to opiates. For a while lately he seemed to be keeping himself in check and life became enjoyable together, not perfect, but okay. Three weeks ago at a routine doctor visit he was given a script for clonapin Tranquilizers. A very dangerously addictive drug. And here we go again...... When these pills run out, and his brains addiction centers firing like the fourth if July , he will return to his first love -vodka.
This is simply the reality. There is nothing I can do. I must admit I lost my mind for two weeks, slipping back to raging codependency
Then I re read my journals: here is how I put detachment into place then, and am doing again
1. The library- free, quiet, filled with books, information and your cell phone must be turned off!
2. Gratefully WAITING for my turn in a crowded nail salon .
3. Playing MY music in the car, especially on my way home, play it loud and sing instead of worrying and obcessing over what I will find at home.
4. I found a weekly meditation group and attend regularly.
5 in my home I have made myself a "sacred space" and respectfully asked my husband to kindly respect it as my own . I went so far as to tell him he was not welcome there if high.
6. IGNORE to the best of my ability his outbursts, attention getting behaviors, and if possible drunk/stoned behaviors.

NO this does not make him " better" but our home is less chaotic, and I can let that ball of anxiety that lives in my chest get a little smaller so I can actually breathe and swallow.
Blessings on this day to all of us and those we love and try to love.