I just decided it’s time I joined the group. I can relate to every post I read on here. We have been married for 21 years, have 3 wonderful children. Our 2 grown children avoid their dad and talk to him only when they have too. They have seen his downward spiral and think I’m crazy for putting up with it. Me and my daughters are super close and they have grown to resent their dad for the way he is and how he treats me. But when you love someone so much it’s not easy to let go and see clearly. Our 14 yo son is the only one still living at home. And this last week I left... my final straw? Our son who came to me crying because he can’t take it anymore.  I knew the day would come for my little man to finally realize what was happening. And I’m sorry I didn’t get out sooner. Our son and me are close and have a very good mother/son bond. And it gutted me to hear him express his thoughts on his father. The man who should be his idol and protector was slowly pulling away from him too. I’ve tried to hide his drinking, picked up after him every night, said oh he’s just tired. I ran out of excuses eventually. He was always a moderate drinker but nothing crazy, but about 8 years ago things started escalating. When the arguing started about 4 years ago I knew I couldn’t hide it anymore. He’s just a sloppy, mean and verbally abusive to me drunk. (He says things to me when nobody is around to hear him) and other countless wonderful memories of drunken times. I’m to old for this crap. I’ve been a faithful, loving and caring wife and mother, what did I ever do to deserve this type of disrespect?! I finally started standing up for myself and that’s when S**T hit the fan! Drinks a 15 pack almost every night yet goes to work everyday so in his mind he doesn’t have a problem it’s just that he’s stressed out. Says I tell everyone about him, accuses me of cheating etc. when in fact I try to hide his drinking from my family and would never step outside our marriage EVER. He on the other hand has reached out to other woman, 1 of which I know. The embarrassment I felt was overwhelming. And he never would tell me why or say he was sorry, just used he was drunk and lonely as an excuse. I have never trusted him since.  Says he never physically cheated so it doesn’t matter