Wives of Alcoholics Community Group

A forum of healing and help for wives of alcoholics.

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My first post I don’t where to go from here

rayray8386
rayray8386

Don’t really know where to start, iv been with my husband almost 12 years and married for 6, we have 5 beautiful children my eldest has just turned 10 and So he is old enough to notice that his dad has an issue with alcohol and although my husband he is a hard working man and provides for us he is never present to just spend any time with us, he’s either at work or at home drunk either way myself and the children struggle at times to get any sort of attention or conversation from him and it’s breaking my heart. He has attended alcohol seminars and has been hypnotised more times than I can count to attempt to stop drinkin but it is always short lived and Even for the time when he touches no alcohol I’m left living with a very snappy angry man who finds fault in everything as he’s always so on edge with a drink in him.


so I spend majority of my days alone then I spend majority of my evening with the kids upstairs banging around and playin while I watch tv alone with either their dad not there at all or on occasion he’s there but he’s passed out drunk and I’m not sure I can keep putting myself this and I certainly can’t keep putting my children through it I’m sick of being de-prioritised in favour of work and I don’t know what to do I love him and I don’t want to walk away but I feel I’m running out of options 

UtahMamaBear
UtahMamaBear
rayray8386 My heart feels for you. I know the pain and loneliness you are feeling. It's so hard to know the right thing to do when you have your kids involved. If I had all the answers I wouldn't be on this site but you need to know that you have support from all the men and women who have and who do walk in your shoes. You are not alone sweet lady, please remember that in your time of sorrow.
rayray8386
rayray8386
Thank you so much for your kind words ❤️ Xxx
hopelesswife
hopelesswife
My heart goes out to you. I feel like you’re describing my life. My husband spends his weekends binge drinking upstairs while the kids and I stay downstairs. He drinks until he passes out and stops when it’s time to work. I’m so lonely. I’m at my wits end. I don’t know where to go from here. Prayers for all of us. I’m so happy I found you all.
AnaChai
AnaChai
I can relate. I am currently sitting next to my husband who is passed out on the couch. It is heartbreaking, and such a lonely place to be. You are not alone. I wish there was an easy fix for addiction....
rayray8386
rayray8386
It really is such a lonely position to be in, i find that I can’t talk to anybody about it either as it’s almost like admitting defeat if that makes sense, I can talk about it in this forum as we’re all going through the same thing but I don’t feel I can talk to friends or family about it as I find his addiction embarrassing, I don’t want other people to know how bad it gets because I don’t want there pity and I don’t want them to hold it against him either I feel like I want to punch the life out of him at times and also protecting him from judgement from people around us it’s so confusing xx
ellabella2
ellabella2
Rayray, yes! Exactly! Plus I find people that have never felt with an alcoholic, just don’t quite understand. They don’t grasp why it’s so hurtful or they don’t understand why your husband just doesnt quit drink. It’s all so foreign to them. And yes I don’t want anyone to hold anything against my husband either. My mom is the only person that I tell EVERYTHING to. She’s so sweet and nonjudgmental and always can make me feel better. Idk what I would do without her and without this group! Hang in there friend!