So Labor day weekend I went to Disney with my daughter to celebrate out 4yr olds birthday. AH stayed home, i'm used to him not wanting to go and to be honest things seem to go better. But theirs still the fact that he's drunk texting me while i'm trying to drive and when I don't answer he gets more annoying. So I decided to ignore him, the next day I told him that I wasn't going to spend her weekend arguing with him. If he needed to talk we would talk when I returned and when he's sober! He then started blowing up our 14 yr olds phone which I could learn alot from her since she completley ignores him! 

When I returned home he was already drunk and since I only have the morning sober good byes as he's leaving for work, I haven't had a good time to talk to him. I still refuse to talk while hes drunk. But I had my chance this past Sunday as I was leaving for church I told him how it I feel, after 31 years i've always tippy toed around talking not wanting to hurt his feeling and trying to sugar coat everything. No more I shouldn't have to pretend anymore. I told him how his drinking has made me resent him and how I wait for him to fall asleep before I go to bed, I don't see the man that I feel in love with and i'm not that cold heart B that he want's to make me out to be when he's drinking if so I would have already kicked him out or moved out. I will not allow his drinking to consume me any longer, and I will not allow it to hurt these girls like it did our children. Can things change? It's intirely up to him, I will not insist that he quit drinking. Because that would only make him resent me. At this point I don't even know if he quit drinking how I would feel. The damage is there and I don't know how or if it can be repaired. I told him that i'm not being mean I just have to seperate myself from it, I don't drink but I feel like i'm the addict. No longer i'm to old for this crap and life is to short!