Wives of Alcoholics Community Group

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Husband just is not going to work regular

wavesofchange
wavesofchange
Husband started missing several days in a week, knowing our bills are a month behind. Which they are behind due to him not going to work regular off and on for a year now. I do not work due to our special needs child. Out of the last 10 works days he has worked four. Then he is home happy as a lark, just lays around. He is in his early fifties and has drank since his teens. The only thing he does in or for this house is bring in an income.....now I can not depend on him to do that. What the heck has happened?
Is this common in the later stages of alcoholism?

Then he will sit and have all these big plans of buying a new house and other things ? ! Which is never going to happen ruining his credit right now.

We fought a few weeks ago, I printed out all the bills the amount total for the month and all his monthly income and lack of income. He turned it around that I was to blame ....not paying the bills. He never has taken blame for anything. I want to leave after 23 years I am burnt out. Is this new behavior considered abuse, for me to get help getting out? Sure feels like mental abuse.
wavesofchange
wavesofchange
To add, to this ....when we fought I left the home, He called drunk the second night only saying I hate you. I was stood my ground until he started calling me and leaving messages after that second day, he then beat me down until I cried on the phone. That was when he asked if I was coming home. I did , I could not stay where I was. I was crying because I was pissed at myself for letting him get to me. In a week, he was right back to staying home. Cells were cut off, he knew it and used the house phone to call off. Blows my mind. Never seen this with him to this degree. Sorry for the rant but he called in today hungover and up on the phone until late. Super frustrated right now. He already missed Monday and Tue this week. Ugh!
Ginny03
Ginny03
I'm sorry for what you're going through. So scary to have the person who is bringing home the income to start jeopardizing that.

Hard to answer whether he is in the later stages of alcoholism, except that when an alcoholic consistently starts to miss or is late to work, he is well on his way. And each is different. Mine has been doing this for some time now. I haven't figure out why work hasn't let him go yet.

I don't know if this is considered abuse, it may be considered abandonment if he's is not financially taking care of you and your child, especially a child with special needs.

Take care, know that you're in good company and that if we find the strength we can change our world.

Hugs