Wives of Alcoholics Community Group

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endlessgrief 09/01/2018

Recently, I mentioned to other members that we should start a funny drunken moments thread. Yes, what we are going through IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER. No one knows that better than us. However, some funny things do happen when they are drunk and you can't share them with friends and family due to embarassment BUTTTTTT, you ladies will get the humor in our stories because we all live it every day. So let's share some of our funny stories and giggle a little, WE NEED IT.

WILD WILLY

Waaay back when I first met my hubby (1986), I bragged about him to my friends as the coolest guy I ever met and he was my opposite, he was so shy!!! We got invited to a house party and played TRUTH OR DARE with some Coors tallboys. This is the first time I took him into my circle of friends. This was the first time I saw him drunk it suprised me more than it did my friends.

Bad behavior countdown from "the shy nice man I was dating"

All the things below happened within 1/2 hour of each other. It was like a fast train I couldn't stop and I kept yelling into my head I BRAGGED ABOUT NOW NICE THIS GUY WAS!

1. He started to cruly make fun of our hostess and her lazy eye

2. He found out in truth or dare that our hostess liked anal sex, so he kept yelling anal sex jokes at her.

3. He was thrown out of her house by her screaming at him (I was about 2 inches tall at the time). At this point I looked like a fish out of water, mouth opening and closing not know what to do. This wasn't the same I guy I met, what was happening. It was like a movie. . .

4. In the parking lot as me and my friends were tryiing to get him into the car (I was stone cold sober), he whipped it out and began chasing me around the parking lot PEEING ON ME!!!!!!!!!!!! HIS friends were there and he was showing off. So ran from my "date" chasing me around with his dick out, peeing on me. After that he was a legend among his friends - THERE'S WILD WILLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! puke

I was 19 years old, he was my first serious relationship and the man I gave my virginity to. My parents adored him. I wanted to break up with him immediatley, but his sober persona was WONDERFUL and he told me about his awful social anxiety that pushed him to drink at public functions. That was my first SOB STORY that hoovered me back in.

2018, I'm 51, he never drinks in public but drinks all days at home. But there are plenty more stories of his stupid behavior and it is like therapy to share these stories with all of you.

So ladies, drop your guard, unclench your stomach, take a deep breath and purge the stories you have never told anyone for fear they would judge you for not leaving him. They wouldn't get it because they didn't marry a drunk. It's time we had some fun at their expense. mmmwwwhhhhaaahahahhaaa

endlessgrief 09/01/2018

Maybe I am the only one that's gonna share the stories but that is cool with me, I got so many and I feel the need to get these stories off my back and share them with people who will get them.

Back in 2008 when the economy was ruined, he was out of work and drank more. I was working 12 hour days making hand books for the soldiers at war in Iraq regarding their equipment. One of the worst jobs I ever had.

When I left for work at 6:00 am, he would be drinking in his chair (he had a back injury and could only sleep in his chair for about a year). When I came home from work at about 6:00 p.m., he would be passed out drunk from a full day of drinking while I was at work.

There was this stupid commercial about a dude who accidentally got his body tattooed with tiger stripes on his whole body. The Chinese tattoo guy said YOU TIGER NOW.

Well, dipshit grabbed a permanent marker and proceeded to draw in and color tiger stripes from his face all the way down to his waistline. I took pictures and still tease him to this day.

endlessgrief 09/01/2018

Once, while having sex with him, I was on top. As I did my best sexy girl thing on top, he leaned over sideways and puked all the stuffed cabbage I made for him that day over the side of the bed. I flew off him like I was in the matrix and refused to sleep in that room until he cleaned it up.

Another example of me BEING DONE WITH HIS BULLSHIT and my whole family pushing me to stay with him. I valued my family's opinions over my own and they said STAY WITH HIM. So I did. Recently, I discovered the roots of a very emotionally abusive family where my father's appalling abusive behavior was excepted so my mother pushed me to stay with a man abusing me because it's all she has ever known.

I have recently gone NO CONTACT with that nest of vipers which makes my life with a full blown drunk all the worst. Hence, sharing stories on here since I no longer have a support system.

2Irish 09/03/2018

Sharing our stories in a safe place is uplifting. My stories all start with his 'reflections' of the past ..."we were drunk...we were partying...i passed out..." the only activities that take place now are his snoring on the couch.

at the end of the day we can only do the best we can with what we have. A phrase that i think about is 'it is better to have loved and lost than to be stuck with a looser'.

Laura82 09/07/2018

I love this idea. So probably not the best but the only one i can think of right now.
our Basement flooded and about a week after it happened my husband came to bed muttering about water everywhere. I started freaking out thinking the basement flooded again. The. He told me, no no the basement is fine and i went back to bed. In the morning i am getting ready to leave for work and was thinking back about the weird conversation from the night. I suddenly looked over at the futon he likes to pass out on when drinking. I go over and sure enough it is a soaking wet in the middle of it. He passed out and peed all over himself!

APieceOfMyHeart 09/10/2018

My (now 4 months sober!! :) ) husband talked in his sleep when drunk. He also for whatever reason would always decide to cook when drunk- don't ask me why. It would drive me nuts because I don't cook so all too often food would go bad because he would take something out to thaw then pass out and be too drunk/ hungover to make whatever it was until after it had gone bad. Anyway, his best talking in his sleep while drunk was when he had passed out while making fried chicken. I tried to wake him asking "Dear, how long was the chicken supposed to stay in the oven?" To which he replied "Look, I am sorry I didn't tell you but he brought this fate upon himself." I started dying laughing and said "The chicken?" He rolled over and I went and dug the box out of the trash. We both laugh about still, years later...

Happymess6 09/13/2018

My hubby passed out drunk on the bed one night beside me. I woke up to the sound of what i thought was rainfall. So i look our the window and nope, no rain. So i look beside me and find that he is peeing in his sleep! I can't get him to get up so i grab a bottle and put it you know where. Well he pees in that, i remove the bottle. He keeps peeing, i grab another bottle, then another, and another. By that time i ran out of bottles and just put a diaper on top of his "rain maker" and went to dump out the newly filled bottles!!

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