I feel so overwhelmed with how long it's taking me to secretly prepare myself to move out and be on my own. I'm financially dependent of my AH, I still have atleast 2 more years before I'll have enough saved and repair my credit to get my own home without struggling. I plan on legally separating before actually divorce because I know this is going to be a long costly process. Advice I would give my younger self is dont ignore those red flags and just move on with your life. I wish I would've done that. I saw the early signs and just ignored it. But in a positive note, I've never been so happy to leave a relationship. I'm usually the "do whatever to make it work" type. But this Is different. I'm very excited. To move on, start a new life and find the true love I deserve. I'm so excited for that and cant wait. My life almost feel like I'm serving a prison sentence and just cant wait for my release date. It's so awful lol.however I'm glad I was able to emotionally heal from a "break up" so when I'm on my own I am not a wreck and strong for my 7year old who will hurt the most from this. Thank you for taking the time reading this, I just needed to vent.