Wives of Alcoholics Community Group

A forum of healing and help for wives of alcoholics.

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suemagoo 10/01/2017

Today marks the first day of my life last night had another usual Saturday "episode " only worse - he came home drink from the pub wasn't getting rise from me so started arguing with my 14 year old who has mild form of ADHD and he started goading him for being in a special school at hearing this I did rise to the bait I was furious my son is very sensitive as it is and then his boss owed him money so he called with that and sneaked out of the house so quietly I didn't hear him leave when I realised he left I rang him said are you in the pub he said yes more than enough to hear he came back few hours later and had spent all his money !! He woke at 3.30 AM shouting over our daughters cot I tried to ignore him but said ssh u will wake her she has been gd all night then I told him he should be ashamed of himself and it was then for the first time he was abuseive towardsme he kicked me so hard the cot moved he then said just get into bed we can sleep n not wake grace but he then proceeded to push me kick me and hit me and sit on top of me - and all this going on woke my daughter who was crying I just taught imagine my 6 month old been woke by that what must she have been feeling - it also woke my son who he proceeded to shout at so it was in that moment that I taught I am their mother their protector I can't have them living like this so at 9Am this morning I told him he needed to pack a bag and leave and stay with his mother r whoever but our marriage is over so he can't live here I'm quite upset about it all but I know I have to stay strong and know that what I did is for the best in the long run , he was quite shocked but i can't take anymore. Something had to change it's his first time been violent towards me but once is enough and it was just going round in circles he isn't willing to accept that he has a problem!!

CeeCee4 10/01/2017

Watching your stories, he was progressing to physical violence. Im glad you made this chlice for.your and your childrens safety!! STICK TO IT AND DONT TAKE HIM BACK! Be strong and build your support network. Very scary and hard. Totally here for you. <3

learningpatience 10/01/2017

that's a brave move, and for sure, the right one. you protect yourself and your children. funnily enough, that's his job too, to protect you and your family, and he's completely and fully failed. seek help, seek a lawyer, find out your rights. tell everyone in your family and his family what's going on, so he can't use bull sh*t to keep trying to get into the door. you are strong and you'll be able to do just fine without him. as long as you take all the necessary steps to stay safe. i got a lot of information from the women's shelter i visited when i was in the middle of my AHs break down earlier this year. going to a shelter was not what i wanted but my name isn't on the house and we're not married, so i had no say, and he was telling me i had to get out (drunk all the time). he was violent with you, that's all you need to get out and to get support - they do more for women who are victims of domestic violence, sad but true. i'm proud of you, and we're behind you 100% of the way. keep us posted. it will be hard, but you can do this. <3

suemagoo 10/02/2017

Thank you ladies it's so nice to have this group , it gave me the strength to leave sad truth is I love the bones off him but I was living in la la land wAiting for him to realise his problem and while I was doing that it was slowly getting worse but it's not just me so I have to put my feelings aside and do what's best for my children he has tried to come back but I told him it's not happening!! Staying strong now and keeping to my word is what I'm trying to do now he hadn't told his family but I told his mother - he hadn't so now she knows the full extent of it now I don't have to "cover " for him anymore

IamDonetoday 10/07/2017

Hi...don't believe him if he comes back saying sorry, he'll quit, and that it will never happen again. Without serious help and a good amount of sober time, don't believe his words, watch what he does not what he says. What he did to you is unforgivable, and yes you need to protect your kids and yourself. Good for you, remember what he did to you, so you can remind yourself why never to go back. You and your kids deserve happiness and a safe life. Bless you!

Amber39 10/08/2017

It's takes a lot to end it I know. I just joined this group. I am desperate for help. My husband is an alcoholic and he drinks over. Thirty pack a day on the weekends plus liquor and takes steroids. He's verbally abusive to me in front of our daughter. Tells me what a mooch I am and that I'm a slut. I'm a liar. And so on and so on. And he's the one that has been caught so many times. We live in a small town in Texas. I hear a lot of what he does but not everything. He has and still does stay out all night and I'm home with our daughter. He tells me hates me and to leave. So today I left. I can't do it anymore. So why do I feel guilty?? I'm so glad I found this group. You are doing what is best for you and your kids. Your children look up to you as their protector.

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