I ran into this on the web somehow and am scratching my chin in recognition here....since Mr. Wonderful can go on a binge at the drop of a hat after days or weeks of sobriety, the shoe seems to fit. Caused by childhood trauma, etc. etc. Well, he was raped by teenagers when he was around 8 - he was raised in an orphanage. My usual hard-assed stance: Get over it. My own childhood would make most people's hair stand on end. My siblings and I grew into responsible, hard working, successful and loving persons. We got over it. At least most of it.

While on a binge, he turns into a frightening personality that I don't know. Maniacal eyes that make me shudder. Total 180 from Mr. Fit 'n Trim doing his exercises and indulging in his self-righteous lectures to me about eating more fiber and fruits. Horse puckey. All alcoholics are totally self-absorbed while indulging, all or most are in denial. They are psychological (and often physical) bullies who try to wear us down by their excuses but, of course, as we all know, bullies are all cowards at heart. That's why the name calling. It's their only defense, second to only denial.

Finances have kept me from leaving but someday...oh, someday. This is not how I want to live out my golden years.