AH has been in the hosp. 23 times this year due to liver failure. Yesterday he got  news he is officially on the transplant list. Our whole 35 year marriage has been hell and it's even worse now. When he was in the hosp. I felt free and like a kid. Thank GOD for the NO VISITORS, it was happiest I have been in years. Now grumpy fuck is home but still very ill. I wait on him, I bow to him, I sit in a room with him sweating my ass off (menopause) and he is cold (sick) and he couldn't care less.

When was the last time this jerk asked the simple question "how are you doing? how is your online tshirt business coming along? how are you feeling today?" Thinking back, HE NEVER ASKED ME QUESTIONS BECAUSE OUR WHOLE LIFE HAS BEEN ABOUT HIM AND HIS ALCOHOLISM. His lack of affection, whiskey dick. Today he threw at me that he pays the bills and I should just shut up about my feelings and I walked out of the room. 6 years ago, he started drinking in our home every single day, all day, every day. I moved into another room. We haven't had intimacy in 6 years. No hugs, kisses, cuddles, NOTHING. Now, he want me to sit in the room and watch tv with him AND I DON'T WANT TO. However, I am the cold one, I am the asshole. I feel out of love with this man years ago and faking like I still am in love with him is giving me an ulcer.

Can anyone relate with their own stories?