My husband has been a hard core alcoholic for the past 2-3 years to the point where when he is off the wagon its like his job. He's been to rehab and was sober a few months and now its just a constant roller coaster; a few weeks good, a few weeks bad. When he is sober things are great, but when he's not its so frustrating. I feel like i have to babysit him all the time, he drives way too drunk sometimes, he won't eat or shower or take care of himself unless i make him. It's hard to watch him be like that...I've seen him lose a lot of weight during his binges because he just doesn't eat hardly anything. I've heard people say detach, but i don't know how. I also fear that when i detach, I worry I'll detach too much and it'll ruin our marriage, although of course with all this our marriage isnt great anyways. But i love him so much, but its one of those situations that is hard to be in and hard to walk away from. I find myself getting so bitter and resentful at times and sometimes i feel so angry like i want to yell, but i know that doesnt fix anything and doesnt help the situation nor myself...so how do you cope? Just one of those things that you find yourself asking "when is enough enough" and i know the books and everything say to put yourself first, it's just alcoholism is like being next to a black hole, it sucks you in, and it's such a negative environment. he wakes up at all hours of the night to keep drinking which wakes me at all hours...i just feel so overwhelmed and over it, yet sad for him at the same time.

thanks to all for listening. sometimes you just need to vent.