Wives of Alcoholics Community Group
A forum of healing and help for wives of alcoholics.
So my AH is drinking...but only 1 bottle of 375ml Tequila once a week. He drinks it in one night, he "hides" the evidence, and he seems to have made it a plan to cook something for the kids and I while he does it (he drinks late at night after he gets home from work and we are all asleep).
I feel....a little lost. Not sure what to expect, as he hasn't maintained this "low" level of drinking before and he sure isn't talking about this. I don't know whether he can keep going like this, don't know what this means considering he HAS had serious alcohol problems (usually can't stop once he starts), I realize that probably what I am feeling is my lack of CONTROL!!!! I'm not enabling, but if he continues like this, and can control it...is this still alcoholism?
As usual, I'm getting a little more clarity just from venting... So...I guess just keep working on me, and try to stop worrying about HIM!
I would like to know if anyone has any ideas though!
I feel....a little lost. Not sure what to expect, as he hasn't maintained this "low" level of drinking before and he sure isn't talking about this. I don't know whether he can keep going like this, don't know what this means considering he HAS had serious alcohol problems (usually can't stop once he starts), I realize that probably what I am feeling is my lack of CONTROL!!!! I'm not enabling, but if he continues like this, and can control it...is this still alcoholism?
As usual, I'm getting a little more clarity just from venting... So...I guess just keep working on me, and try to stop worrying about HIM!
I would like to know if anyone has any ideas though!
Joe Herzanek's website. He has helpful ideas for families of alcoholics...He was an alcohlic or addict? long ago and now he's has an organization to help others...
Good luck....
Also go to www.empoweredrecovery.com there is an excellent inexpensive PDF you can download. If you have children this is a MUST read. WARNING: clarity will ensue.
Al Anon. Go, go consistently for a month or two. You will gain clarity and peace of mind. It's not immediate or a play by play. But you will figure it out on your own.
Get in front of an Addiction Therapist. Yes, YOU. You the one who does not drink nor drug addictively. they will help you get out of this enmeshment with an addict so you can get your life back.
Toby Rice Drews = Funny and Empowering. But I must say, she's out of print. HOWEVER, that means hardcopies are available on Amazon pretty cheaply. :)
Lots of love to you all. Please put one foot in front of the other. Move forward and away from chasing someone who is chasing a bottle. You are worth a real life not living in the shadow.