My hubby's is still up. We had the same password, so in the first few days I would log on, and I told people if they wanted to add him, I could confirm it. I only did that for the first week. I have logged on once every 3 months or so..well, longer since. I won't read any of the messages people send him. At this point, I haven't logged onto it in a few months and don't want to again, but it is still there, and relationship status is still married to me. I won't delete his. I have photo albums, his friends don't. I want to delete my account a lot of the time, but won't do that either because almost all of his pics are from my albums.

My wife's is still up also, 9 months since she passed. I used mine and her account often in the beginning to communicate with friends but eventually i just didnt care anymore. seemed like everyone had these happy lives to share and mine had been lost. so i stopped using it and just go on once a month or so just to see if she has any messages i should deal with like old friends who dont know she has passed. also i have family and friends who say they like going on once in a while to see her. I know what you mean about the creepy thing but whatever! im not going to worry about that, just do what your heart tells you. blessings, Bernard

Don's is still up also. One of my cousin's son's passed away the year before Don. He passed from melanoma cancer. He was only 38. His Mom changed the name of his FB account to a Memorial to Jason. He was in the music industry and that way all his friends still come on and post pictures of them and Jason hanging out & and such. She said she wants to keep it open for his young boys. That way one day they can go on & see all his pictures & beautiful notes from friends. They also put his music videos on there. So it's pretty cool to go on still hear him singing & talking and see his happy smiling face. I don't think it's creepy at all.

Personally, I would close the account. You have the photos, and they are personal to you. (((SOFT HUGS)))

My Mike passed away three months ago, at about two weeks, I told my friend that I couldn't hear his voice in my head anymore....my sister-in-law had saved messages from him on her cell phone and she recorded them on the little recorders like Build a Bear puts in their stuffed animals. She put the recorder in a Beanie Baby Bear for me and OMG, I love it...I play it whenever I feel the need to hear his voice. We have since made them for everyone in the family that wanted one. My grandchildren each have them. We find it very comforting, I know everyone may not find it so, but I thought I would share.

It sounds like you are not ready to close her facebook account. Maybe you should put that aside for now. You have not even reached the one-year mark, so perhaps for now it is a comfort to you??

I closed all of Cliff's accounts that I could - a couple I had to leave open for other reasons. A couple of accounts it took awhile until I could get them transferred to me.

I left his voice message on the voice-mail for a long time - in fact until I moved to the UK - not just because it was great to hear his voice once in awhile, but also it gave the impression that there was still a man in the house and I felt more secure that way. I had a lot of freaky calls when I became a widow, including several people trying to sell me an alarm system which I think were actually just crooks trying to find out if I HAD an alarm system. I am not ashamed of doing what I felt necessary to feel safe.

I think perhaps you should record her voice in some way to save it permanently for yourself. I have Cliff on tape, playing guitar and talking, and it is bittersweet to listen to it. It makes me cry most times, but sometimes it is a comfort to have it. It has the same effect on our two sons - it is usually unnerving for them.

Cliff also shows up frequently in my dreams and sometimes he says things, so I do get to hear him. The first year I was widowed that was not the case. It seems the farther along I get the more frequently he shows up, and I think that has to do with me being more comfortable with it. I think the first year I had maybe two good dreams of him (with many terrible nightmares of his death). Nowadays, it's about once a week and it's either okay or good - almost never a bad dream. Weird but true.

Do these things at your own pace and for your own peace of mind. Some will think you should keep everything the same, some think you should change it all, but the reality is that it is what helps you through this that counts.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

Facebook will do a memorial for the page. I'm not sure exactly how it works, but you can contact Facebook to see how to do it. My husband wasn't on Facebook, but I wish he had been.

Nessie from KY

I searched Memorial on the Help Feature on Facebook and it comes up with a complete list of what to do. This was the first thing that came up:


When a person passes away, we memorialize their account to protect their privacy. Here are some of the key features of memorialized accounts:

No one can log into a memorialized account and no new friends can be accepted


Depending on the privacy settings of the deceased person's account, friends can share memories on the memorialized timeline


Anyone can send private messages to the deceased person


Content the deceased person shared (ex: photos, posts) remains on Facebook and is visible to the audience it was shared with


Memorialized timelines don't appear in People You May Know and other suggestions


Creating a timeline in remembrance of an already deceased person is not allowed.

First of all I would copy and save all of the pictures that you would like to keep to a folder on your computer--that way if anything ever happens to the account you will have them. You can also copy and paste any comments or posts that you would like to save. Memorializing it sounds interesting--I had not heard of that--just changing the name to "memorial for" would be a good option too if you still want to receive messages there. I think whatever you decide to do would not be wrong--whatever you are comfortable with is what is right for you.
As for the voice mail--Steve has been gone for over two years and our home phone still has his voice on it--I have no idea if and when I will feel the time is right to remove it--I will definitely try to record it somewhere else so I don't lose it.
Warm hugs
Wanda

I closed my wife's account almost immediately. She didn't use it, and people writing to hers and their messages popping up on my timeline just made me sad.
I have everything I need to remember her in my own way.

Don didn't have a facebook page, but I saved his last voicemail on my phone for five years. It wasn't the greeting, but he called the day he was coming home from the hospital to say he hoped the coffee pot was set up and see if I had left to pick him up. He died that same week and I loved hearing his voice. The truth is if you want to keep her page or her voice you have every right to do it. It will never be creepy to anyone who has been widowed. The rest of the world can deal with their own issues. It's about you now, not others. Sharon

WD, I agree with Sharon. Joe's voice is the message on my cell phone. It's staying for as long as I deem it to be so. If someone gets freaked out because they're hearing his voice...I mean, give me a break, people. He's not going to come back and haunt you. Joe didn't have a FB page, either. Hell, neither did I until after he died. I say keep your wife's account open. You can check it as little or as much as you want. It is NOT creepy. Marsha

My wife was a techie like me and we both had Facebook accounts. We posted all the time and found it was a great way to keep in touch with all the family and friends. She passed away 5 months ago and I decided to keep her Facebook open. I told people if they hadn't already friended her to send a request and I would approve it. The kids and friends posts to her wall and so do I if I want to journal or just to " talk" to her. You are right all her history is there and I don't want to close it. I am keeping the profile as she had it with the pictures and all. Your choice is up to you. My choice is keeping her digital presence going.

I still have my husband's facebook. I feel when it is time to close it, I will until then I am leaving it. I wish I had a voice message from him, but I don't. My husband died suddenly and I have no voice recordings except his hello on his cell. It has only been 4 months for me.

That message in the stuffed bear idea is great!