Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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rubyd 05/01/2016

I am so glad my husband always pushed for me to know how to pay bills to have a checking account. I didn't always take his advise on that but in the 4 yrs before his death I had to take care of paying bills and all the homecare. Before the stroke took over he showed me how he payed the bills by keeping a journal of payments each month. I didn't know none of that I thought I was going out of my mind when he first had the stroke. I am now a pro I learned how to pay bills without my gas and electric being cut off. I am thankful I had a training period before he officially left us in body. I miss him so much. I didn't have the help from adult kids and death don't change nothing I still don't have the help. I am glad we was not a couple that did everything together and he didn't die suddenly. Just because you are married don't mean you give up on your life still live life to the fullest for you. And when that day come you won't be so lost for how do I go on by myself. My husband worked so much that his second home was his job. So I was the one to take kids everywhere until he got older.

gregsbaby 05/01/2016

I always tell women that they should have their own bank accounts and help manage the joint account as well because you never know what can happen in the blink of an eye! My DH used to be upset when we were first married because I used to say I don't need a man to take care of me; I've always depended on myself so when he came into the picture it was weird for me. On down the road he understood what I was saying; there were a few times I told him to reassure him that I did want him

snowalone 05/01/2016

interesting, my John would take the time to show me things, that at the time I was like "okay, why are you showing me this? I really don't care to know it!" Of course, I didn't want to SEEM disinterested or rude, so I would watch. Then he died. And, it's almost like his spirit knew, ahead of time, that I would need to know certain things. Weird.

Of course, there were other things, he forgot to show me, like where the car title was or his insurance policy! But, everything somehow worked out.

The divine and our intertwined spirits, have their own time plan for many things beyond our understanding, surely it's true; and if we're able to trust that that's what in control and not merely ourselves alone in the panic or chaos we presently find ourselves in...can sometimes be a necessary grace.
(of course I rarely remember that when I most need to!) nanne

Nanne

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