The milk is already spilled. It spoils a little.

A dear friend in this forum told me that when you feel unbalanced that's when you make a conscious effort to balance yourself. I think of these job-descriptions have to be filled by multiple persons, and some could never get filled.

Once I accepted all of the above, then my mind is given room to think about how to make life better under these realities.

That sums it up very well.

Your wife is your beloved angel and she will love you for the rest of your life through all the special memories that only you both shared. Every moment is precious.

I have just recently joined this support group. I am struggling to keep myself together for my Grand children 5 and 7, that I got custody of just days after my husband passed away from liver failure, Michael's Birthday is the 31st of this month, he would have been 51. Our anniversary is the 8th of February and he passed the 24th of February 2017. I try my best to make a good life for the children, but I'm emotionally exhausted. I can't sleep, I don't want to get out of bed in the mornings, and can't stop thinking about him. The night he passed was horrific thanks to his family and I will never forgive them, but whats even worse is I can't forgive myself for letting them steal the dignity and respect he should have had in his last hours.

I’m so sorry toni. You have a lot on your plate. Stay with us and read or join in if you like...you’ve found a safe and loving place that can help you.
Warm hugs,
Darcie

So sorry to hear ToniO. That's sounds like some nasty baggage you now have to live with. I hope you get some relief from this group of grievers,and hope your pain lessens.

I just lost my wife in October. Battled a horrible disease. I tell her that I miss her but not when she was sick. I don’t miss those days. Trust she is in a better place than her recent pains. Trust that she watches over you.