I am with you on this matter. It is not silly at all.

End of November, before I left for Australia, I was not going to send any Christmas cards, but then I relented because sending Christmas cards is such an important tradition in the UK that I felt mean not to. People do mean well and their good wishes are sincere. So I culled all the "meaningless" cards and just prepared a few for the people it really means something to. One of my friend has posted them for me a few days ago.

It felt odd not to pass them on to my husband to sign his name but I was ok about this. He did prepare his own cards anyway.

One thing, I am happy about is that both my daughters have said they would come with me to the Christmas Eve service in memory of their father. My husband, unlike me, was a religious man and I always accompanied him on that particular night. I was pleased they both thought about it. I hope it will help us.

Big hug to you.

I did Christmas cards...but I didn't have the heart to do the ones with pictures on them like last year. I hated the idea of not having his name on them...since he is a part of this family. so I went and made a stamp (got the supplies at hobby lobby) that has 3 hearts and his initials and I stamped it on the bottom of each card. that way he is still on there.

I always sent what few cads we sent. What I found hard was not signing his name to them. The found it really hard to send to his family. But I did. All that I had addresses for. There has got be a 1st for everything. So, I got it over with.

2014 is going to be a better year for me!!!!!. I demand it!

I just can't do the Christmas card writing this year, my heart truly is not in it. I have received cards - taking my time opening some of them, but have put them back in their envelopes after opening them. I appreciate the thought of them, but I simply have no feelings of Christmas.

I sent only a small number of cards. A few included my wife's name because a special gift was included that was truly from both of us. The rest I didnt. This season is proving to be much more challenging than I anticipated. Your body is going through the motions but Christmas really brings the grieving to the forefront. The companion we are used to sharing the holiday with is no longer there and that is so incredibly painful. I cling to my faith and try and move forward. I hope and pray 2014 is kinder to all of us. God bless. Gerald

We never sent Christmas cards these last 10 years. But we get some from people who have always sent them to us.

I got one this year addressed just to me. It was from Kay's best friend - they were friends in high school, and she visited every day Kay was in Hospice. Every year she always sent us a card.

Without opening it I knew that it had to be very difficult for her to address that envelope. So I called her without opening it and talked to her. I told her that it must have been very difficult for her to address that envelope. She burst into tears AMD could hardly talk to me. But I thanked her.

When I opened the card, the note inside said that addressing that envelope was the hardest thing for her to do.

So it's not only difficult for us, but for everyone our loved ones touched.

I also had a very difficult time, decided to do Happy New Years cards instead and ordered them from Walgreens. I think it will be easier after the first of the year to do the cards. God bless.

I have not sent cards in years. Not sure the last time I the received one. The other when the mail came there were two. One was a very good friend that has been trying to get me to go out more. All it said was remember that" some one loves you". The other one was from sister and her family., It reads
Some years,
it's hard to celebrate the holidays
with a truly happy heart
So hope this season brings
simple comforts,
warm times spent with loved ones
and the knowledge
that you're thought of
and very, very loved
After I read the cards I really felt that people truly do care. So I still did not send out cards instead. I called my sister and talk for a long time. My friend, we have sent a date to go out on the town.

I didn't send any cards out and never really considered it. I haven't even sent all of the thank you cards yet. I try a few and then its too much, so I will get them all out when I get them out. I'm just trying to get through the holidays but certainly have no holiday spirit.

Russ,

I didn't even shop the first year after my dear hubby passed. No cards, no decorations, nothing. Gave my kids money to shop for the grands with. Just could not face it.

Second year I did everything, but only sent a card to my great aunt, because she lives far away. Actually, I've given up on sending cards. Partly because it's something hubby and I used to do and partly because email is so convenient.

You will feel a whole gamut of emotions BandiBlue, and as we know, emotions are never logical. So, please be gentle with yourself.

For the first few months, I felt that I should not leave my home. What if he really didn't die and could come back?? How silly, but that's a perfect example of emotions being illogical.

Sending hugs - you will find your way out of this. We're all here for you.

I usually send out New Years cards instead of Christmas cards. This year I sent out some to those that sent to me. I received so many sympathy cards in July, when my husband passed. I am sure that people do think of me and my family, but it is such a busy time of year. Especially since Thanksgiving was so late this year, I think it caught some by surprise. I know not as many people send out Christmas cards these days, due to the economy and such. Next year I plan on getting back into my routine of New Years cards, it just wont be the same.

Christmas Cards... yes. I sent cards to people who sent them to me. All of them were addressed to just me and that makes sense. I am sure it would be weird for them to put my sweeties name on the envelope and it would be weird for them to have me sign both of our names.

BandiBlue, I am sorry you broke down after mailing your cards. I truly do not think anything we do or feel is silly my friend. It is all part of our healing. Thanks for sharing!
I sent out Christmas cards to mostly the people I wanted to thank for their support over the last two years during Ernie's fight against cancer. I figured as difficult as it was for just me to send to them that it would be just as difficult and awkward for them to mail to just me. God Bless...
Best wishes and warm hugs,
Mary

I too sent out Christmas cards mainly to thank the people who supported me and Pam this year. I just signed my name to them that was the hard part. Most of them went to couples we knew so I figured the would understand. It is amazing how such a little thing can make such a big difference.
Best to you,
Jeff

Thank you, everyone, for sharing your thoughts on this. I wish a holiday of peace for you all.