Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I have had a really strange week this week full of ups & downs.
I came back last week from my trip away where I attended my brother,s wedding followed by scattering Bill,s ashes in his home town then spending a week with family & my best friend. I was feeling quite good when I got back but then felt a mixture of confusion sadness and guilt to have had a good time .
I was then informed that while I was away my 3 daughters went to see a medium and made contact with Bill . The medium said that he was with his mum & dad and went on to describe his mum perfectly she also told them various other things which I wont go into but they took great comfort from this. She also said to tell me that Bill was very proud of they way I was coping ( not sure that I am ) She finished by saying Bill was trying to do her out of a job as he was telling them that this was a one off and that he now wanted them to get on with their lives but that he was watching over them and always would be and there would be times when they would know he was there.
This is where my feelings got confusing for me, I knew I should have been happy knowing he was ok but I found myself feeling hurt and resentful that he had chosen to make contact with them and not with me and this upset me a great deal.
Then tonight one of my good friends on DS pointed out to me that Bill
will have felt the need to make sure his girls would be ok and be able to get on with their lives.
My friend also made me realise that Bill has been sending me signs that only a life long partner would understand so there is no need for him to make contact through anyone else, this has helped me see things clearly and helped with all the confusing feelings (Thanks Tom)
So you can see what I mean by " The importance of DS friends " they not only support all of us but they also help us put things into perspective when necessary.
Sorry this is a bit long winded but I wanted others to realise just how much DS friends can help if they have not been coming here for long.
Thanks to all my lovely DS friends I am surviving the grieving process
Hugs to all Pat x
I came back last week from my trip away where I attended my brother,s wedding followed by scattering Bill,s ashes in his home town then spending a week with family & my best friend. I was feeling quite good when I got back but then felt a mixture of confusion sadness and guilt to have had a good time .
I was then informed that while I was away my 3 daughters went to see a medium and made contact with Bill . The medium said that he was with his mum & dad and went on to describe his mum perfectly she also told them various other things which I wont go into but they took great comfort from this. She also said to tell me that Bill was very proud of they way I was coping ( not sure that I am ) She finished by saying Bill was trying to do her out of a job as he was telling them that this was a one off and that he now wanted them to get on with their lives but that he was watching over them and always would be and there would be times when they would know he was there.
This is where my feelings got confusing for me, I knew I should have been happy knowing he was ok but I found myself feeling hurt and resentful that he had chosen to make contact with them and not with me and this upset me a great deal.
Then tonight one of my good friends on DS pointed out to me that Bill
will have felt the need to make sure his girls would be ok and be able to get on with their lives.
My friend also made me realise that Bill has been sending me signs that only a life long partner would understand so there is no need for him to make contact through anyone else, this has helped me see things clearly and helped with all the confusing feelings (Thanks Tom)
So you can see what I mean by " The importance of DS friends " they not only support all of us but they also help us put things into perspective when necessary.
Sorry this is a bit long winded but I wanted others to realise just how much DS friends can help if they have not been coming here for long.
Thanks to all my lovely DS friends I am surviving the grieving process
Hugs to all Pat x
I have felt Don's presence from the time of his death to the present. I was never not aware of him being with me, even as I grieved his physical presence sitting alone to eat or coming to an empty house.
I think my point is perhaps talking to him as if he was there may help. They aren't the shell we lost. They are the spirit we continue to love. Sharon
HUGS and SO IMPORTANT are the friendships we make at DS...
Diane