I so understand and feel the very same way. I know life is a wonderful gift from GOD, but it is hard to keep going when your best part has gone. GOD be with you

I know, I had my birthday a month after my husband died. It was awful. Now our anniversary will be next month. Hugs to you.

Btlcrzr,

As to be expected, sadly, you tell of sensitive information & it storms the heart to read this. And I understand that this is a walk along the most undesirable path of life. Each day the journey is impacted by the free-living emotions & you will feel like you're going nowhere. I hope that I may offer you some useful ideas.

What is forming here is boiling stress brought on by the environment of your circumstances. And with many of those processing the symptoms of grief, it seems less tolerable while in home. At home memories are sharper & not easy to compress, because you are constantly over & around the area which you shared with your beloved. Do you find that feelings go solid & then soften for a few days? I know that you tell of constant tears.

However, at some point, heavy feelings naturally subside, spontaneously, even if only for a few moments. And do take advantage of these times by seeking to find your calming self. Yet, while experiencing those days of vivid memories, you will be tempted to squeeze out as many thoughts as you can recall & this is painful pressure to the emotions. A routed plan must be forced to evacuate overwhelming sadness.

The best way to begin helping yourself during crying spells is to distract when you feel sadness first developing, right away. You simply cannot tolerate long periods of painful thoughts forming in your mind. Perhaps, calling in dependable family or a nearby trusted friend will help to uplift you & momentarily expel those ripening unhappy feelings. Then if all else that you do to comfort yourself fails, then it may be the proper time to speak with a health care professional.

Solid hugs,

Remiah ♥~♥~♥

Btlcrzr, how long has your husband been gone?
I'm sorry you're so despondent. Today is your bday. God has let you wake up?! He loves you though he has let your husband be taken as he has mine. God is the greatest "health care professional"...He will wipe away every tear in the next life-- no more death, crying, pain, sorrow. The things of this age will be gone. But now we're in them. Be strong and endure...

Btlcrzr....I know how you feel....that is what I prayed for when my husband passed, just 5 weeks ago. I still am very heavily burdened with his loss and cry everyday. But, I know that God wants me to continue my life until it is my time to die. I know it's going to hard mentally and spiritually. Pray and ask God to be present in your heart and mind and to show you His will for you. He will comfort you. My heart goes out to you and I pray that you can find some peace. Your husband would not want to to be miserable. Happy Birthday and God bless you.....sincere hugs....Linda

Lindonn,doesn't that sound like my earlier post

Btlcrzr,
This is the third reply I'm trying to send to you.the first one I was asking Lindonn didn't the post I did earlier fit in with what you posted...if you get a chance it would help you greatly,it was about what our spouses would want for us...but as to your birthday,picture this...my Birthday was the very next day after my husbands services.I don't even remember the events of my birthday ...it was like The Footprints in The Sand (God Carried Me Through It) without a trace of the day except I had a Birthday the day after my husband's service....that being said The Same Loving God Will Carry You Too
I've never not wanted to wake up,my thing was wanting my husband of 29 years to be here still..:.May God Bless You With The Peace of Mind You're Standing in Need of