I would say listen to your inner voice, you might have postponed some thoughts or feelings before, and they are surfacing now. Still, since we have to function in the world, it is a good idea to "schedule" your full emerging into your heart when you can explore what it tells you without being interrupted,or even reprimanded.
Bereavement is a long process,prepare yourself for "setbacks", floods of emotions, and memories.
Hope you will feel better soon.
hug

Yes, I went through similar times. Periodically I had to take 'mental health days' - a day here or there just to sleep, veg, cry, or whatever I needed to recharge my batteries.

One of the things I found so hard was all the constant adjusting I had to do in order to take care of all the stuff Cliff used to handle on top of my half of things. And single parenting is tough work! I just felt like I was working at 200% of capacity all the time and that is exhausting!

Can you take a day off here or there? And do something relaxing for a change? We all need a break sometimes.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

I have felt just like you describe. I certainly don't think those feelings are less valid at four months than they are earlier.

Will it really be so bad if you don't do any of the work till tomorrow? As hard as it is, because it can make you feel like "here's another aspect of my life I can't handle well" sometimes it is better to go on home and shut down and then try it again tomorrow. I know my experiences are new, but I have found that sometimes it's like when you admit you have a cold and go home as compared to the times you stay at work, and let that cold linger for days and days.

You don't have to prove anything to your co-workers or yourself. Someone told me "it's important to be kind to yourself." please take that to heart.

I did - and it'd a terrible feeling. Google "inertia in grief" inertia stage of grief. I found some helpful information about this. I had no idea about all these feelings - inability to focus, inertia, feeling there was no purpose to my life. It has been almost 6 yrs. now, and IT DOES GET BETTER! Nothing is immediate, though -- all takes time. Many find books on grief helpful. My heart goes out to you, and I pray you will soon feel much better. (Four months is very early in the journey)
Doye

Yes-I definitely noticed a hump around 4 months. For me, the good news was that it did lift and I was feeling better around 5 months.

Grieving is a very exhausting experience. I tried to stay so busy at first but it finally caught up with me, kidney infection and exhaustion.

Just listen to your body and remember to take care of yourself.

Diane

My husband died a month ago today. Although we've lived in this area for 12 years now I don't know very many people and it seems that everyone I do know is hanging back with communication. I was doing "ok" until three days ago, then is seems the bottom has fallen out. I spoke with my step-daughter (hubbys only child - who lives a long way away as does my son) and she said she feels the same way. Fine except the last several days have been awful. I don't want to see anyone but I don't want to be so completely alone. I want to sleep all the time- I know that is an escape, not wanting to face reality. I hate feeling sorry for myself - of course I'm not the only woman who has lost the Love of Her Life. Just posting this and reading other posts is good. Thanks for reading this.

Yes, many times. Remember that grief (and all the emotions attached to it) is circular, not linear. To me, when this happened, it was kind of like my body was telling my mind to slow down and just be. I know you can't do this at work - neither could I, but when I got home I would veg out, if that's what it took. Take it easy on yourself! Hugs, marsha

I am over two years into the process and still have those days. Often lose focus and cannot concentrate. Fortunately, my boss (who I have worked for 32 years and who knew my husband) understands and is compassionate. Grieving is a VERY slow, VERY painful process and everyone's journey is different.

Give yourself time, give yourself a break, and if it continues consider getting help. I did and it seemed to make a difference.

Hugs,
Barbara

For sure.. I am at 10 months now, Im doing well for most part but I still have days where I wish I was alone and didnt have to deal with anything or anyone. Its pretty normal.

FM0528-- Oddly I so admire the effort you are making to get thru the daily struggle and I can't see that in myself. I am eating well, running, doing yoga, staying away from booze or negative coping mechanisms, trying to look for the positive in the day to day and still feel like a boat in the violent seas without an anchor to anything or anyone. Totally, utterly lost without my wife as a mirror to all the good I contributed to the world. Thankfully I or we can see the good in others and can continue to support. Best, V.

Thank you everyone. The last couple of days have been ok. I've done much better than I was on Tuesday. I am still completely exhausted, I think I could have gone to bed at 6:00! And my focus at work is awful! I have ADHD as it is. I do seem to be able to get stuff done starting around 2:30, which gives me two hours of being productive. Better than nothing I guess. And I do try to just relax once I get home. Laundry that needs to be folded has taken over my living room and I honestly don't really care right now. It can wait until this weekend. I simply do what I absolutely have to do. LIke make sure my son gets fed, his homework done, and in bed. And at that point it's my turn to go to bed! Thinking and praying for you all!