Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Seven weeks

Lady101
Lady101
I feel so lost. It is seven weeks since I saw my husband snorkeling in the beautiful waters in Hawaii. Seven weeks since I watched them pull him out of the water, unconscious. Seven weeks since I watched the other boat take him away from me. Seven weeks since I last saw him alive.
Seven week since I was able to be held in his arms and hear him tell me he loved me. Seven weeks since I heard his wonderful laughter.

The world is upside down and I can't find my way. The house is beautifully decorated, all the trees are up ...and it's so empty. Everyone tells me "you are so strong" and "you will do this" and my heart keeps screaming "what's the point, he's not here to share it with me"

It's seven weeks and I can not seem to find my husband anywhere. I hear other people talk about how they feel their loved one or have a dream and I would give anything in the world to be able to have that happen. We were always together, the other half of each other since we were teenagers, and I just need to feel him, know that he is here with me. My faith usually keeps me grounded and i remember that we will be together someday, ...but now....today......I just feel lost and empty and alone... with no answers, no hope, and a growing fear that I have lost my husband even beyond this place. The common sense side tells me he is with me, that you cannot lose love like ours....but today the other side, that tired lost side, is winning
rochelle1466
rochelle1466
7 weeks....7 weeks...its so brief. give yourself time to feel everything you are. Its natural and part of the process. 7 short weeks. Shock, despair, anger, bargaining, all of these things we must face. I admire you for putting up your trees and decorating and I am confident you are strong but strong does not mean you are not hurting and at your wits ends at times. Allow all your feelings to come out because they are better out than in. That is my take. I am sorry you are hurting. But I pray you keep getting up each time you fall
dually
dually
7 weeks, I am at week 28..looking back to week 7..I think the shock was starting to wear off, everyone went back to there lives..things are getting too real.

I am doing better, call look back and see I am getting stronger. Time is our only friend right now. Be kind to yourself and remember we are here and we have your back.

Peace to you
Dually
holland69
holland69
Dear Lady, our world is indeed upside down. The longings...the emptiness...the "what's the point." We all understand. Dreams and times when you feel your loved one close are very strange things. At 17 months only twice have I felt as if my wife near to me...in the same place, away from home, both times entirely unexpected. Now I go there regularly just to see if I can sense her presence again and I never do...but still hoping. I know a couple who lost a child many years ago...the father has regular dreams of the child, the mother who loved just as much never has. Perhaps they will come to you eventually...I hope so. As dually says...be kind to yourself...be VERY GENTLE with yourself...and come here often for sympathy and understanding.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Dear Lady101, today i saw your expressions! and so true they are that I feel like you know how i feel today!
Here at this place, Yes hope exists, Yes be gentle, Yes Breathe, Try and take steps! I have been here for 4months now due to loss of my Wife. I survive and have actually smiled and still cry! still feel empty and yet hopeful for the future, that being tomorrow.
Many others will express much and guide those of us new!
Soft Gentle Hugs and be easy on your self....
Rick
jerseydebbie
jerseydebbie
I'm sorry for your pain, but I do understand. Your husband is there, unfortunately you are still in the early throes of grief to feel anything other than pain. I can't tell you when, nor can I tell you how, but the time will come when you might dream about him, or feel his presence around and within you.

The love you had and have will never die nor dissapear.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Today is 2months since I lost my husband - I saw his shadow once I'm not sure why he was here. I did not feel any comfort from seeing it. I am numb and feel like time is not moving. Not like it used to move. I get up go to work see friends and family. Talk to people so they know I'm OK. I am his second wife so he is now at rest with his first wife. He was the best man I've ever known, don't know why he was gone in the blink of an eye. I will miss him everyday for the rest of my life.
I just am - that's the best I can do today.
Peace and Love it must get easier.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Its been 10 months and I really can't say I felt my husband's presence. What I can say is whatever we walked together in this life will always have an good impact on my daily life now without him. This part of life isn't easy in any way, but day by day will bring on more healing...