I went in the following week after he passed and it was too early so she suggested that I go later on after some time had passed if I needed it. I did have a few sessions and some of what she said stuck with me and did help.A good counselor will know how to reach you and get you to talk out your feelings and emotions. I did not consider what to ask.

BTW I wanted to do group sessions and would have not been allowed to do so for at least 3 months . In the end after 8 months I opted to take part in the bereavement group offered by the funeral home. That was for me the right thing to do.

As for what to expect, you should expect someone caring who understands why you are there and knows how to help you work through it. You should expect for the tears to flow.

Mary, I went a month and half or so after Joe died (my doc recommended this therapist). I remember the first thing he said to me - "you don't have to be a rock in this room", meaning, he was here to help and I could drop the pretenses of being F.I.N.E. He was not a grief counselor, but he did the best thing he could do - he listened. I went for about a year. It was very helpful. I go every now and again to get "tweaked". Hugs, Marsha

I attended group and individual counseling through hospice. It's open to the public in most areas. I benefited greatly from both. This was a 10 week class for widows and widowers exclusively. We were all in the first year of grief so there was a bond.

Around my third year I began private counseling. I asked my primary doctor who he would recommend. I felt I was hibernating in my grief. Try as I did, I couldn't find any pleasure in life. The more I searched the more hopeless I felt. Finally I admitted, I needed help to figure out how to live again.

My counselor was great. He helped me find my own self worth and instilled my courage to move forward without guilt and with confidence.

Usually you don't have to ask, or I didn't. We just talked. I felt comfortable with him from the beginning because he was recommended by my family doctor. Sharon

I took the one on one counseling offered by the hospice who looked after my husband. At first I thought she was going to be able to "fix" me. That was quickly dispelled after the first session, during which I cried most of the time. I did come to appreciate her visits. They typically involved tears as she made me open up about how I was feeling. She also told me not to seek a group session for at least 3mos as I'd probably find it overwhelming. The first one I went to was just before thanksgiving. I think it helped. I went back again recently as my private counselor is off on medical leave. I think it helps to connect with people who have lost someone. It's an open group so you can come and go as you please. I say try it, what have you got to lose? Good luck, Liz

I have been to a counseling twice. I didn't think I wanted to go, and I didn't think I felt like talking. It has seemed to help. I am in a very rural area, so I don't have the group option. I wish I did! You all are my group. Thanks for sharing!

The Samaritan Hospice organization in my area has lots of group starting every couple weeks, and the also offer individual counseling. I didn't know what to expect, but I felt I wanted to join, because I thought my mind was playing tricks on me at about 2.5 months after my wonderful husband passed away. So I joined their group called "losing the love of your life." The counselor is teaching me a lot, and the other members of the group offer good perspective on confirming what I'm going through is normal. I'm learning so much about how to express my many feelings, and how to take care of myself so I get through this. I recommend this source of counseling highly.