Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Kateydid123 07/08/2018

Well, a lot of you probably don’t even know me. I haven’t use this site for several months now. To be honest, I don’t know if would of even made it without the people on this site. I had my one year anniversary yesterday. I took my wife’s ashes to our favorite marina here in Southern California called Dana Point. I took a very special bottle of wine that Tracey And I bought a little over a year and a half ago to celebrate her cancer free diagnosis. I sat there looking over a beautiful Marina and reading my wife’s diary she wrote all through our honeymoon. People walking by me probably thought that I have some really weird issues because I was balling like a baby. I have been doing better the last few months but yesterday took me right back to the beginning when my beautiful little redhead died in my arms. I was the only doctor that week, in our bedroom. My only suggestion to all of you who have recently lost your love of your life, is to stay and poor your guts out. This is the only place where you share your feelings with friends who knows exactly how you feel. You really won’t find it anywhere else! And my heart aches for each and everyone of you. Dave

Deodarglow 07/08/2018

Hi Dave,
It's nice to hear from you again. It sounds perfect what you did to remember Tracey on the I year anniversary. I also appreciate your sense of humor about that people walking by might think you had some really wierd issues. I have felt that way before when going through a Grief trigger while in public. Your attitude is great and that will be helpful going forward. Hugs,
Carol

simit 07/08/2018

Hi Dave, I remember you! Don't know if you come back to read this but you've done a great job sharing and coping on here. Ah yes, I don't know about others but I can't look at popcorn the same way any more. What a beautiful story. Take care and all the best, S.

Kateydid123 07/08/2018

Hi guys, Didn’t quite leave yet. It’s nice to hear from both of you. It’s been a long time and I hope you both have healed some in the past months. I have been doing better, but as you know, that Wave of Hell just comes crashing down on without any notice. I can honestly say that I will live. I can honestly say though, that life will truly never be the same again. Let me know how both of you are doing, and I will get back on a later check on you both. PS. Katey is seeing A therapist, but she really is doing Ok.

Maluis 07/08/2018

Hi Dave,
Mate, don't be ashamed to show your feeling in public, the days of being tough and nothing rocking you are over and it shows how much your young lady meant to you. I have just started my journey, as my wife of 20yrs passed away on 13 June 2018 from rare cancer in Australia this one has 1 : 1000,000 chance in getting it. Anytime you need to talk to me let me know.

Maluis

cliffskat 07/08/2018

You had every right to bawl your eyes out. I still do every year, even after all this time. People die, love doesn't. It sounds like you did what you needed to do. Wishing you better days ahead, and I'm glad Katey is doing okay.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

Kateydid123 07/10/2018

It feels good to come back DS to be honest, I was worried it would take me back to day one! But looking back, I think DS pulled me out of the Darkside. Don’t give me wrong, I still have my days. God, she was so beautiful and funny! Martha, Maluis & Simit, Katey and I are going to live, and so are you. Some how, some way, we have to learn how to endure the pain, the got wrenching pain and move forward.

You guys are the Best
Dave

Kateydid123 07/10/2018

Sorry Carol my old Friend, Did not mean to leave your name off! It’s nice to hear from you again also.

Dave

newatthis 07/12/2018

Thanks Dave. I husband died on 6/27/18. I was holding his hand when lung cancerfinished the job that it stated. I had 42 years with him that will never be erased. And like you stated only someone who has been their will understand. Be blessed

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