Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Not a good time for more Stress!!

loveddogs
loveddogs
My Husband of nearly forty years passed on April 23rd. As a Reator I had my daughters home listed and wouldn't you know it would go under contract while we had hospice coming. And then they find a FSBO (for sale by owner). So, with everything going on at home, and passing,I was trying to negotiate on both homes. We got them both put together. But I had to deal with inspections, title companys, addendums and on and on. My daughters home closed fairly smoothly once we worked thru all the hurdles. The one they are buying however is another story. The inspections got backed up, the appraisal got backed up, and working with a cranky old seller who knows more than I (because he's sold a few homes.) Has been a flipping nightmare. Because of the delays in the home they are buying, the kids were forced to be out of one house before the other is ready. So their stuff is in storage, I have two of their dogs and they are living with his folks with all their food in ice chests. Every aspect with this process got messed up by human error. The seller is threatening to put the house back on the market if it didn't close today because it was supposed to close Friday. He gave us til 5:00 today or he would sell it to someone else. I have pushed and shoved everyone involved as far as I can. Didn't help that the seller was leaving nasty calls at my office and with the lender threatening. So today at 4:50 I finally get the call that we are clear to close. Now we have to wait for the title company to do their job and should be able to close tomorrow or Friday. I thought I would have a nervous breakdown, (and still might) going through this while all I wanted to do was grieve my beloved husband. Life just never gives us one bad situation at a time. Seems like it's just constantly heaped on us. And of course my soulmate, my best friend wasn't here to listen and tell me it's going to be ok. We are supposed to close tomorrow or Friday. And then I am taking the whole month of July off! I do feel like I deserve it!! Thank you all for your support. As you can tell I have had enough!! Hugs to all, Michele
npc4204
npc4204
Wow! You're dealing with stress on top of stress!
I hope it all goes smoothly at the closing. And, yes, you definitely deserve some time off.

Hugs,
Janie
ruthannstewart
ruthannstewart
You deserve a whole month off too I think !! It's amazing how some people can be a__holes !! Makes you wonder what happened in their life to make them like that. Such a horrible time to have more dumped on you, it must be unbearable ! I just hope that you take all the time out that you can and do what you want and need to do for yourself !! It's just not right that you had to deal with all that but am glad it is over for you now, I hope. You go and do your greaving and healing and just do what you want to do !
Best wishes to you Michele'
Ruthann
tiger1962
tiger1962
Michelle, sorry to hear this. Yes, sometimes life comes in forces and storms. My mom and my wife were diagnosed 1 month apart. Huge storms coming at unexpected times always.Take all the time you want. You earn it. Remember, just like bad storms cannot destroy sky, our grief doesn't define who we are. Hugs, tiger
sandeestttn
sandeestttn
My gosh... just keep piling it on. You did good. Now its time to rest for a while. Bless your heart. Sandee
maryelnew
maryelnew
yup, sometimes life really is a hurricane - it just doesn't feel it, it is. l Hugs to you. I hope you are able to get in some time just for you.
ptorres
ptorres
Michele, Sorry you are dealing with so much. I understand completely. One of my dogs bit a neighbor a couple weeks ago. He has been acting strange since my wife passed and the neighbor understood. Of course the bite got infected and she had to go to the emergency room and then they kept her overnight. Since she had to go to the ER it was reported to animal control. They didn't give me a ticket because the neighbor asked them not to but he was quarantined for 10 days. All this while I am trying to refinance my house. I'm waiting for the out of pocket hospital bills to come in and can't claim it on my homeowners because that would raise my mortgage all while I am trying to stay in my house. They say God doesn't give you more than you can handle but I wonder sometimes. Take some time for yourself. Pete
hgsdms
hgsdms
So sorry to hear about all the extra stuff you had to deal with on top of the awful grief. The old saying was "when it rains, it pours" and I often think of that when things keep piling up and it seems like you just can't take any more.

Glad you are taking a month off. You need the rest.
Hugs, Darlene
bookdragon
bookdragon
Vent away Michele!Time off may be just what you need, Hope the rest of the closing goes smoothly! Patti
dschwartz
dschwartz
Michele, you are so right . . when it rains it pours! So sorry you have had to deal with this extra stress. Sounds like it will all come together soon and then you can take the time you need to re-coup and gather your scattered energies. I often say that I feel like "I'm waiting to exhale". Seems like you are waiting with me . . til then, deep breaths and hang in there. Hugs, D