Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
Before starting this job I worked many years in the healthcare field. I made some friends along the way but they were all in my same type of job, had kids, family we had similar lifestyles. Now I work in the management field and I feel so out of place.
I love my job but All the people around me are older, grown children, grands, and a more lavish lifestyle. Its almost like they are so above me if you know what I mean. I love being from a small town and I am proud to say I have worked an honest living and worked for what we have. There is nothing lavish in my world.
Its just that the new co workers and I don't seem to have much to talk about. I met a man yesterday that works in my building occasionally. He's younger but not by much. It is policy that we take the new people to lunch so that we can get to know them and give them more of a sense of what is expected of them in their job. This is my first lunch of this kind. (being his boss it is my job) It was SO SO scary. Being out with a man in a professional setting and being the one he was looking to in the "boss roll" Yikes!!!
We talked alot about the job and job expectations and then he began telling me about himself. We had a very good conversation. It went from work to personal very easily. He has had relationships and has a young adult daughter. We talked alot about our kids. He had heard that I lost Mike and he asked about that and my life since then. I held back tears and told him minimal things as to not mix business and personal. I am wondering if this is ok?? Can you actually have a friendship with someone who has such differences?? Some one you work with?? I have worked with mostly woman and I don't have a good self-esteem and I don't have much experience or many male friends that were not directly linked to my husband and his job. Any thoughts would be appreciated Thanks
Lisa
I love my job but All the people around me are older, grown children, grands, and a more lavish lifestyle. Its almost like they are so above me if you know what I mean. I love being from a small town and I am proud to say I have worked an honest living and worked for what we have. There is nothing lavish in my world.
Its just that the new co workers and I don't seem to have much to talk about. I met a man yesterday that works in my building occasionally. He's younger but not by much. It is policy that we take the new people to lunch so that we can get to know them and give them more of a sense of what is expected of them in their job. This is my first lunch of this kind. (being his boss it is my job) It was SO SO scary. Being out with a man in a professional setting and being the one he was looking to in the "boss roll" Yikes!!!
We talked alot about the job and job expectations and then he began telling me about himself. We had a very good conversation. It went from work to personal very easily. He has had relationships and has a young adult daughter. We talked alot about our kids. He had heard that I lost Mike and he asked about that and my life since then. I held back tears and told him minimal things as to not mix business and personal. I am wondering if this is ok?? Can you actually have a friendship with someone who has such differences?? Some one you work with?? I have worked with mostly woman and I don't have a good self-esteem and I don't have much experience or many male friends that were not directly linked to my husband and his job. Any thoughts would be appreciated Thanks
Lisa
The professional side has to win out, so after that initial required lunch that your organization makes you do, I would just do group lunches and meetings so that no one can insinuate that there is favoritism or something inappropriate (between an employee and a supervisor) appearing to go on.
If you stay professional and essentially disregard whether you're working with a male or female, everyone you supervise will have a good role model and should follow suit.
Maggie
Hugs, D