You will adjust to this. It's not a steady feeling better every day, but rather a roller coaster of emotions. In time and with many tears you will find days that you feel better, followed by days of despair. Just know that this is "normal " for those who lost a huge part of their life.

I lost my husband to lung cancer almost 10 years ago. I found it helpful to write him expressing my feelings and thoughts. I released many tears and even anger at being alone. I wrote anything that came to mind.

This month would be our 50th wedding anniversary. I have been trying not to dwell on the day, but it's hard. Even now I have triggers that make me feel sad. But I recognize them for what they are. Triggers. The biggest thing is that I know that they will pass. Sending you my love and prayers. Sharon

Thank you so much Sharon and so sorry for your loss. It really does help hearing from someone that understands. Today was one of the tougher days and it's good to know that it is not a steady progression of healing. The grief combined with the anxiety makes it worse. But, I guess I just have to keep telling myself to "ride the waves." I just miss him so much and the pain can get despairingly deep. I appreciate you reaching out.

Each day comes...
Each day ends...
Each day brings its own set of emotions, some good, some disheartening.
It has been 3 years since my husband died from pancreatic cancer. I can attest the highs & lows are not so severe. A friend who previously lost her husband counseled me to make sure I was "busy/scheduled something" on milestones.

It does take time, we each grieve in our own ways.
Take little steps..
Give yourself credit...
Accentuate the positive...
The pain & despair do lessen with time.
Keep the faith
jdp

I lost my husband in December. He was 51 and died of lung cancer just 13 weeks after he was diagnosed. I too feel like there were things I wish we talked about. I honestly don't think either of us thought he would be so debilitated, so quickly as he was a very healthy man with literally no signs or symptoms of his illness.
I'm trying very hard to keep busy. When I slow down I seem to fall apart emotionally. I tried counseling and didn't find it super helpful. I just joined this site last week but feel that it's giving me amazing support.
I wish I could provide you some helpful tips but I'm not there yet. I'd say we both just have to push ourselves to find like minded people and literally try to make it through one hour and then one day at a time. You know?? Sending you love hugs and prayers.

I lost my husband in December. He was 51 and died of lung cancer just 13 weeks after he was diagnosed. I too feel like there were things I wish we talked about. I honestly don't think either of us thought he would be so debilitated, so quickly as he was a very healthy man with literally no signs or symptoms of his illness.
I'm trying very hard to keep busy. When I slow down I seem to fall apart emotionally. I tried counseling and didn't find it super helpful. I just joined this site last week but feel that it's giving me amazing support.
I wish I could provide you some helpful tips but I'm not there yet. I'd say we both just have to push ourselves to find like minded people and literally try to make it through one hour and then one day at a time. You know?? Sending you love hugs and prayers. If I can help in any way, please let me know.

Thank you for your heartfelt responses. I appreciate being part of this group because it helps when you connect with someone that understand (although I wish none of us were goi g through this). It's so hard but I guess I have no choice but to ride the waves. Missing him so despairingly and have many moments during the day that it hits me that he is gone and it's hard to believe.

In two weeks I will be at the one-year mark of my husband's passing. It does get better but the ache is still there, just not as crushing as it is in the early days. For the first 5 months I had to take a mild sleeping pill every night or I wouldn't sleep at all. In the first 6 months I would start to cry when I was driving or even in public sometimes. That doesn't happen anymore. It's been less than a month for you so you have to expect that it's going to be hard for a while but you will start having good days soon. All the best to you.