Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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My son and his Dad

mel40
mel40
A couple of nights ago, my 21 yr old son decided to spend some time with me. We talked and laughed. I drank too much wine. While visiting with him, I kept catching glimpses of my late husband. His humor, his insight, his understanding, his noble character and his patience. In a way, I felt like I got a few moments with my late husband. It made my heart hurt and heal at the same time.
My son is a grown man and I was only able to see Mike in him because the grief has released it's hold on him. He is happy, pursuing a future. The anger, confusion and hurt have subsided.
I miss Mike. I also look forward to more time with my son and sharing his Dad with him, as well as with my other son and my daughter. It is good to remember....it is good to carry on.
sandeestttn
sandeestttn
That is so nice.....

My oldest son looks like my husband. built like him. has a lot of the same mannerisms. My son is almost 48. They found Stage 4/4 bladder/prostate cancer at age 50 of my husband. . I am afraid my son will have it at that age too. He visits a whole lot, and has to urinate at least every hour.
Community Leadercliffskat
cliffskat
My sons are big guys now, like yours Mel. They are each like Cliff in certain ways but different ways in each. The ways they are not like Cliff, they are a bit like my own father. The older one is built like Cliff but dark like me. The younger is fair like Cliff, but is built a lot like my father was. It is sometimes comforting and sometimes unnerving when they do something - a facial expression, a gesture, a laugh - that is like Cliff or Daddy. I am comforted that a bit of them both lives on, at least for now.

Love and Hugs,
Martha
mel40
mel40
I AM happy that Zack got the insight, values, sense of humor, patience and other characteristics that made Mike different from many men! Mike acquired them as he aged. They served him well in the latter part of his life!
It is a blessing to "recognize" Mike in him, not just in physical appearance but in strength and character. He will help with getting the 14 yr old daughter through her snarky, unsure teenage years....
asarivg12
asarivg12
My 36 year old daughter Candice is like a white colored version of my wife ( except smaller - she is only 5 foot tall ). She does not look all that much like her, but her spirit, personality and motherly instincts are exactly like Kay.

However, Candice's six year old daughter Layla - holy cats. My friend when they first saw her called her 'little white Kay'. That is because she looks exactly like her, except she is as fair as any white kid out there ( our daughter married a white guy and all their kids are very light ).

However, my kids are still grieving and it's going to take a long time for them to heal.

It's ok for you to deal with the loss, but it's difficult to see your kids struggle with it. It's a tough thing. I wish everyone the best.

Bob
Patriciavara
Patriciavara
My son has some of the same mannerisms my husband had, same smile. He is taller than his dad but carries himself much the same. My husband was my son's confidant, and now he has a hard time realizing his dad is not there to help him. I see my husband in my son so much, working in the same profession. I am so blessed to have such wonderful kids, so compassionate and they take such good care of their mother. Take care.....Patricia
asarivg12
asarivg12
I just added to my gallery Little White Kay.....

http://www.dailystrength.org/people/3087208/photos-videos/0
asarivg12
asarivg12
That above link won't work, sorry about that. Anyway my pictures are public so you just have to look there. its the first one....
jewells1
jewells1
It worked for me.