Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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My friends loss and my lil' dog

Nicker07
Nicker07
I know many may think there is no comparison but

My friend Dianne just lost her son to cancer, he was 34, she has been living in Oregon to help take care of him, she is crying alot but she has a very good faith. My friend and I are going to drive to his memorial service together I think its a good thing for her....

Now on my little dog - Mitzie - a pound mutt that my daughter got from Warren PA when they were in the service ended up on my doorstep at age 2 because they could not take her - well she bonded with my than 8 yr old lab mix so became ours - now at age 13 herself she is failing. Took her to vet yesterday -was there all day long: liver high with high temperatures but we have her on antiboditics, pain meds and liver pills because she keeps sneaking my cup of cofee (MOCHA stuff) so I t hink maybe thats irrating her liver - etc. so thought for two weeks give it a try. She acts better already this am so hoping she will be with me for awhile longer but I know......I know a dog does not compare to our human loss but since I lost my husband I take my losses a little harder ...
The friends loss and my potential loss of my dog.....
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree that any loss after your spouse is painful as it brings it back up again or you feel for others as you know what they are going to be going through.
Pets become part of your family so there loss is very painful. Our 2 toy poodles were our "kids" so losing them was very hard on both of us. Yes, I understand exactly where you are coming from......... my thoughts are with you and your friend.....take care....hugs
Community LeaderShrn
Shrn
My dogs are my loyal compainions and I understand your fear of losing them. Loss of a dog is painful. And I hope you have yours for many more years. Sharon
deleted_user
deleted_user
I'm so sorry for both of the situations. Losing a precious pet after losing your spouse is gut wrenching--somehow it's like losing another piece of them and yourself. I just went through this a couple of months ago so I understand exactlly what it's like. I hope your little one pulls through. My prayers are with you.
gone2soon
gone2soon
Nicker, like Marti said any type of loss after suffering the pain of losing ones spouse is devasting. This is not silly, I totally understand, If I lost my dog, I would be crushed. Right now I am feeling the loss of the students who were shot and those that were killed here about 15 miles from where I live in Ohio. I didn't know any of them yet I feel like I did. We are sensitive to things like that after going through what we have been through. Your friends son was very young. We never expect to lose our children. My condolences to her. I hope your dog recovers. I would not want you to have to deal with that also. I will keep you in my prayers. Hugs, Anne
deleted_user
deleted_user
Our pets become a part of the family and when they are ill or we lose one of them, we grief. They are such a part of our lives that we can't help but feel a loss. My two dogs and cat are all I have now so they are extra special to me and it would be hard to lose one of them. Hope your Mitzie gets better and you get a cup with a cover on it so she does not sneak any more mocha!
Sorry for your friend's loss. Will pray she finds strength to get through this. Hugs - Gail
Truhal
Truhal
I've only had one dog but I understand. I lost my dog two months after losing my husband. Had I lost my dog first I would have been devastated. But my husband went first and I was in so much pain that I hardly noticed the loss of my dog. I was grateful to God for that.

Anyhow, my dog lived to be 15 and I heard of dogs living into their 20s. So don't count your little dog out yet.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Nicker,

I hope you don't lose another family member! I know that dogs are just like family! NEVER feel bad for thinking that way! Sounds like you are doing all you can for her, and she is so lucky to have you to care!! I hope too that she rebounds for you!!

what you are doing for your friend, is wonderful, kind, and very much YOU. Your friend is also VERY LUCKY to have you!

HUGS and keep us up to date on your little dog!

Diane
anniewho
anniewho
Nicker, so sorry for your friend's loss, and for your concern about your pet. I lost my sweet siamese cat shortly after I lost my husband, and it was like losing another part of him. She gave me such comfort and love when I lost him, that losing her too was so painful. I will keep all of you in my prayers.

Hugs,
Annie
NewRoadsForMe
NewRoadsForMe
Nicker, I am so sorry about your friend's loss of her young son. That is so grievous. I have a friend who lost her son at the very same age. It's devastating. What a good friend you are to her at this time. It's so helpful to have someone who can cry with us when we lose someone we love.

I know your little Mitzi is sick, but I hope the meds will bring her back to good health. She is family to you, so she is VERY important.

Praying for you, my friend. Hang in there.
jremee
jremee
So sorry for your friend - CANCER SUCKS!!! Glad she has faith, as I truly think that helps, at least a bit...

Dogs can become SUCH a part of the family - I know it is sooo hard to lose a beloved pet...so sorry for your pain.

Take care-
MJ
Community Leadercliffskat
cliffskat
I think the two worst things that can hapen to a human being are to lose a spouse and to lose a child. I don't think I could handle losing one of my kids. Please let your friend know about the Bereavement group here at DS, it may help her. I am so sorry for her loss.

And yes, our pets get to be like our kids, not to such a great depth of feeling I am sure, but it would be hard to lose them nonetheless, especially since if your dog is anything like our cat - our cat grieved Cliff, too. He went room to room yowling for him, looking for him everywhere, even started opening the cupboards to look for him! It would have been funny if it hadn't shown how hurt we all were at the time. And it was months before he would come into our bedroom or get on the bed as that was where Cliff died.

I hope your friend finds peace and that your puppy is okay.

Love and Hugs,
Martha
deleted_user
deleted_user
Nicker,
Any losses after we lose our mates are hard.I am so sorry for your friend.I have never had that kind of loss.I am sure it is devasting,my heart goes out to her.
As for your dog,to some of us they are like family to us.I lost my precious little Rocky this fall,and I fought so hard to keep him because I didn't want to lose him.,like I lost Dave and my mom a year ago tomorrow.It broke my heart when I lost him.
Hugs Sadie