Mornings have always been the most difficult part of the day for me as well. They still are at 2 1/2 years but not as acutely painful as the first year or two. I am finally able to linger in bed on a weekend morning whereas in the beginning I immediately jumped out of bed when I awoke to try to escape the pain. I just tried to stay as busy as possible. Eventually after about a year I allowed myself to confront the pain and that took a long time. Things do improve over time. Not easily and not quickly. Day by day. I've tried reading in the morning to distract myself and that helped get me through. Hang in there. I hope you find peace. Marybeth

Mornings are bad for me as well. I think because I was used to seeing him off to work. Then again early evenings are the same. Still waiting for him to come thru the door. Still cant wrap my head around this new reality

Last month mornings were bustling with activity and with noises that I no longer hear. A closet door closing, a microwave chiming "done", a toilet flushing. This morning the silence is deafening.

Yes it feels like a jet lag.

I had to prepare for work in the morning so it doesn't hit me as hard. It's the random things and the times we normally talked that drove me crazy.

Mornings are still my hardest time. I feel lonely when I wake up in an empty house. I've seen this topic come up on here before, and some people say evenings are harder for them.
It's not too bad if I have to get up and get out of the house for work. But on days that I don't have to rush anywhere it's tough. I often call someone to talk to. I'm coming up on 4 years. It does get easier as time goes by.

Mornings are hard for me too. I wake up and think "oh it really happened." Then after work on the drive home gets hard too. He won't be there waiting for me so we can cook dinner together and talk about our days.

Msbklyn- You wrote something that explains a lot. I thought if I could just get through the first year, I would be OK. Well, the second year is just as hard if not more because I am allowing myself feel and face reality. I got through the first year by working 70 hours a week. I did nothing but work. I am trying to live a little now. I am inviting a friend over for a beer. I am going to take a vacation. It scares me to do these things on my own but I am doing it.

Mornings slightly better when sunny, and then a gradual downhill slide for the rest of the day and evening.

Mornings always involved the daily self-argument about why I HAD to get up and live another day and go to a job where no one understood what I was going through (to be fair, some did at least try to understand). In the first couple of years, every day felt like a challenge. I got by on sheer stubbornness a lot. In fact, this song became practically an anthem for me:

Tom Petty - I Won't Back Down
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUTXb-ga1fo

Nights weren't great either, but seemingly for different types of reasons. Hang in there, you will get through it. Wishing you better and brighter days...

Love and Hugs,
Martha

Thank you everyone for being so welcoming! Sometimes I feel like no one I talk to understands how this feels, they say your life isn’t over! But what they don’t realize is my life as I knew it is over! And it’s going to take time to adjust to being without him.

Mornings are the worst for me. I wake up and say “another day without you baby” and “what am I supposed to do without you today”. Sunday’s are especially hard because that is the day he died. So today is a double whammy for me. It’s been 8 weeks today. It feels like it’s getting harder instead of easier. I wish I could lay down tonight and take my last breath. I just want the pain to end.

I know exactly how you feel! This is a journey we didn’t choose to take and it’s extremely hard to get through this. Hugs

Martha, I now love that song I won't back down by Tom Petty. On your suggestion, I listened to it every day, sometimes multiple times a day during my first year. It just has the kind of energy that can keep you going in the face of all hell breaking loose!! Plus you can see Ringo and George! LOL

I just joined this group. It’s good to know that I am not alone in having hard mornings. Starting the day without my husband has been a challenge.