I am sorry for your loss, and the pain you and your daughter are going through. It does get easier, but the early days are very hard.

Counseling would probably help you both. I got mine through a work program (Employee Assistance Program) and they provided counseling for my older son, too. My younger son was still in school, and the school psychologist and guidance counselor both helped him. All of ours was free. If you have anything like that available for you, I would encourage you to use it, and talk with the school folks to help your daughter. She has a right to support at school, and this is going to be more than you can handle on your own. She may also try to hide her grief from you - kids will do this to try and lessen a parent's pain. It doesn't work, but from a kid's view they don't know that, and it can more problems for them. In our case, it was made worse because some idiots told my son to "be strong for your mother" so he thought he wasn't allowed to cry, etc.

I am so sorry you have to go through this, but glad you found us. Welcome.

Love and Hugs,
Martha, co-Community Leader

I lost my wife on Sept 19, 2017 and I honestly can't say if it gets easier. It keeps changing but so far I don't know that it gets easier. I just cope with it continually with change.

Triple hugs of support~ and I am so very sorry for your loss.

New member - I am sorry for your loss.
Lost my wife on March 31, 2018 - tragic accident, sudden death.
We have 3 children and I just don't know how to go on with my other half already gone.

I am so sorry for you r loss. These first days, weeks, months are horrible. I am glad you found DS. It helps me a lot.

For me personally, The gut wrenching pain has dulled but it hasn't gotten much better than that. I have said and have heard others say "it doesn't get better it only gets different" and that is so true. Grief evolves and pushes us along, unknowingly. We are forever changed and forced to rebuild some sort of a life. It seems impossible and unthinkable on most days especially at first but each step we take is a step none the less. My kids were older when we lost the man who completed our family. It has been rough on them also but they are what keep me going and they are the reason I keep pushing for that next step in the grief journey. Take care of yourself. Hugs to you and your daughter

It just was so sudden ..i didnt get to say goodbye..its so hard to even get up and face the day without him..i have to for my daughter.. He had a massive stroke and was brain dead in minutes i wasnt with him when it happened i have so much guilt for that i just want him bk

My fiance passed away at the age of 59 at work of a massive heart attack. He was my world and my handicapped special needs daughter's world. It is so so hard to move forward it is exhausting and sad but we all have to gather strength and do the best we can I am so sorry for your loss I know the horrible feeling all too well and feel the pain in your heart

I am a month ahead of you - my husband died Feb 2, 2018 - and while better may not be the right word, it does get more bearable, the pain becomes less at the forefront of everything. Life really does go on. I have 3 kids - 16, 14, and 10 - and they are adjusting, as well. I don’t think we’ll ever be ok with it - everywhere we go we see families with a dad/husband and we’ll never have ours again - but I think we will adjust to this new normal. We are all in counseling, and I think it’s been helpful. Our local hospice has grief counseling programs for children that we’re going to explore - losing a parent at a young age isn’t normal, and I think my kids will benefit from spending time with other kids who share their experience. Hang in there. I know it hurts but you can do this.

I'm so sorry... I'm only about eight months into this journey but I can tell you that there is no way you should expect to be "ok" at this point. But, as many here can attest, the fog will start to lift. And then it will come and go. Grief is relentless, but human beings have been learning to make peace with it and go on for thousands of years. You've only just begun making your way to a new normal. Eventually, the dark times will be not quite so dark and have longer periods of light between. In the meantime, know you're not crazy... and that you're not alone. I'm not one of the more active members around here, but this community has helped me a great deal -- and I didn't reach out until about the six month point. So keep taking care of your kids and of yourself. Remember what the flight attendant always says... you have to place your oxygen mask on first before you can help others. Rest, water, and forgiving yourself when your fog causes you to forget things are key.