Hi,

I have not been here for awhile, but I do understand how hard it is not to have that one person in your life. I am very sorry about the loss of your wife.

It did help me to talk face to face with others. I never went to a formal group, but I did and still do speak with others (mostly widows) at my church.

If you decide that you are willing to try a formal group session, you could call first so you know what to expect. My church has a Blue Christmas service every year for those who have lost loved ones, and there no way I will ever go. I would be sobbing my eyes out through the whole thing. Others that I know have gone, and they get some peace from it.

It is hard, very hard and there are some rough times. The only way I got through the loss of my husband was one day at a time. For a long time, it looked like life was just one large void with no light. Eventually things will get a little easier, but in the meantime, we are here to listen.

Most of my days are okay, now, but every so often they are not.

Hugs,

Shari

My wife died in Feb 2013. I have been to a group sponsored by Hospice and to one called Grief Share at a local church. Not being a joiner and an introvert I never pictured myself at a "support group" but I have found it helpful and if nothing else a reason to get out of the house and be among people who understand what you are going through.

This site is a great place to share your feelings and talk about memories of your wife. I have attended a grief session at my local hospice, but it is not always easy expressing deep emotion in front of strangers. One of the small things I miss about my husband is his kindness. If we went to a party, he would always come home and tell me I was the most beautiful woman in the room. I knew it was not true, but he always made me feel special. It is hard when you lose the love of your life and best friend. You want to talk about them to keep them close, but it can make other people uncomfortable. Just take one day at a time and go easy on yourself. Maybe some books on grief would help as well.

I also am very private in person. To be honest I even feel a little uncomfortable talking about it to my family. But I think this is a good place to start. It's easier to share what you really feel without holding back when you don't have to worry what anyone thinks or wonder if anyone will understand. You have that here. We are all listening with open minds and hearts because we DO understand. This is such a loving and caring group of people that come here to share and learn and vent and heal together.
I think this site is a good start to working your way up to live groups.
Hugs

MJ46, I also go to Grief Share, attend a Hospice widows group, read as much as I can about losing a spouse and being a widow.
We never had any close friends. I do have 2 gals I can talk to, but it's hard because they didn't know Bob. Nobody says his name. And I think people get uncomfortable when I talk about him.
I'll never feel his hugs or his lips any more. I'll never hear him call me "his sweets". I did find a video where I can hear him talking in the back ground, but I only played it the one time. It's too heart breaking to hear him and see him on the video.
Alls I can say is to take it one day at a time and be good to yourself!

As best friends lovers, confidants, we two, spent all our time together. Happiness overflowed, when others were around it was because they wanted to join the fun. At family outings we were doing elliptical circles coming back to each other in between visiting others, then leaving to come home when it was politely possible.
Losing him was so hard. Here though it's nice to be where others understand the Quake that shhok my world. Like some here the support groups were far and wide from me, too far or late for me to try. I did once, traveling 18 miles, to find a note on the door "CANCELLED" It made wonder if the people lost had resurrected?

Thank you all for your kind words they help. Once again I'm lost and your comments and suggestions,are comforting knowing you guys understand is solace in itself. It is the litle things I miss also, plus I'm trying to find a job, was retired but not that has to change. So thanks again for your responses.

Hugs to all of you too.

I also attended a support group offered by hospice for 8 weeks. There were people from all walks of life and some introverts and some extroverts. One member didnt say a word for the 8 weeks but at the very end thanked everyone for sharing there expereinces which he found healing. There is no pressure to talk, just the support of people who get it. I am starting in another group at the end of October. Hoping for further insights. Of course the wonderful thing about DS is you can access it day eve and night and the people here are incredibly supportive. Please post as often as you need to. Wishing you peace. Gerald

Connecting with others who have gone through the loss of a spouse helps us feel understood whether its here or in a hospice or other group. Our emotions are so intense it's hard to imagine how we will get through the day without the rest of our life. Each day is a new awakening to the reality of our loss and the progress seems non existent. But the day comes when you are able to smile and you look back and see that progress has been.

Just take moment by moment until the day ends and begin again in the morning. You are among friends here who have done the same until the clouds separate and the sky looks beautiful again. Sharon