Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I just had to tell someone that I had to have our dog put to sleep last night. She got very sick recently and became very agressive and biting and she was a HUGE dog.
We finally got her to the vet two days ago. She was so sick adn they kept her in the cage with a muzzle and had to knock her out just to open the cage. She also could not eat (not that she was eatign at all) since they could not remove the muzzle.
My poor baby was just so sick, in pain and scared. They found she had gone into kidney failure and that her body was poisoned by it all. They could have tried to keep her alive for a little longer but she would have to go back to the vet everyday for IV fluids. They said she was so agressive now that this would be very hard on her and the staff.
I could not stand to see her laying here so dehydrated, not eating or playing and not wanting us to even go near her. Her pain was too much for her to bear any longer. I layed with her (and they had the muzzle on her!) as they injected her with three vials and let her sleep forever in heaven without pain anymore.
My heart and tears overflowed as I thought of my Joe and the day 11 years ago when we adopted her from the shelter> Her name was Pheobe (from the show friends). My girls named her since she was a crazy blonde!
She grew so so big but was a sweetheart. Loved old socks and playing tug of war all the time. She lived with my mom since we felt she needed the company after my dad passed 11 year ago. Now my mom is grieving and I feel so incredibly guilty for my decision. My mom did not want her in pain and vomiting all day long anymore and I know it is for the best, but my guilt feel sthe same as when I put Joe on a respirator. I am again questioning my decision. Was I wrong or right? Did i just find the easy way out? Will God forgive me for ending her suffering?
Just two days ago I lost my uncle also after a long fight with alzheimers and yesterday was his funeral. I could not go since we were at the vet awaiting test results and decisions. My guilt today is too much to bear. Ann
We finally got her to the vet two days ago. She was so sick adn they kept her in the cage with a muzzle and had to knock her out just to open the cage. She also could not eat (not that she was eatign at all) since they could not remove the muzzle.
My poor baby was just so sick, in pain and scared. They found she had gone into kidney failure and that her body was poisoned by it all. They could have tried to keep her alive for a little longer but she would have to go back to the vet everyday for IV fluids. They said she was so agressive now that this would be very hard on her and the staff.
I could not stand to see her laying here so dehydrated, not eating or playing and not wanting us to even go near her. Her pain was too much for her to bear any longer. I layed with her (and they had the muzzle on her!) as they injected her with three vials and let her sleep forever in heaven without pain anymore.
My heart and tears overflowed as I thought of my Joe and the day 11 years ago when we adopted her from the shelter> Her name was Pheobe (from the show friends). My girls named her since she was a crazy blonde!
She grew so so big but was a sweetheart. Loved old socks and playing tug of war all the time. She lived with my mom since we felt she needed the company after my dad passed 11 year ago. Now my mom is grieving and I feel so incredibly guilty for my decision. My mom did not want her in pain and vomiting all day long anymore and I know it is for the best, but my guilt feel sthe same as when I put Joe on a respirator. I am again questioning my decision. Was I wrong or right? Did i just find the easy way out? Will God forgive me for ending her suffering?
Just two days ago I lost my uncle also after a long fight with alzheimers and yesterday was his funeral. I could not go since we were at the vet awaiting test results and decisions. My guilt today is too much to bear. Ann
You did the right thing. Sometimes the greatest act of love is to let someone you love go.
Love and Hugs to you and your family,
Martha
We put down a dog last year the day before Bob's surgery, and the mourning for her got lost in all that happened after his surgery. I felt very guilty that it all felt rushed, but with time I know that what we did was for the best - he too had kidney failure, and it was very bad. The were able to give him IV fluids, but it only prolonged the process another 24 hours.
Please don't feel guilty -- grieving yes, for your friend and your loss, but not guilty.
Dawn
I am so very sorry! I understand. I love dogs and kitty kats too. They are precious and a part of the family. It sounds like you made a compassionate wise decision. It took great strength to follow the right path for this precious doggie of yours. I admire this. Wow, such courage!
As others have shared, I know that pets DO go to HEAVEN. They are with those who loved them while on earth. They play and romp about with loved ones. Another precious one to reunite with, aye! You did right, even though doing right brought about emotions. Even still you were courageous and did the highest best for this precious little pet of yours.
AND I am also so sorry to hear of the loss of your Uncle. Blessings of comfort into your heart, mind, body and soul!
(((HUGS)))
Genuinely,
BEAR
Before Charlie's transplant we had both a cat and a dog put to sleep within a year of each other. Both were very loved. Both times Charlie and I sat with them and held them and each other. We also talked about what a loving thing it was to do and how we wished humans could have the same. It led to further discussions about how each of us wanted to live and die.
As you know I had to make the decision to let Charlie go. It doesn't compare and yet it does. It all comes from love.
I love thinking of Charlie tossing sticks for Jesse now and holding Nels after a fun day.
I have my little cat Lilith that Charlie gave to me. She is everything to me right now. If something happens to her there will be no one to hold me.
Julie
It was especially painful because he was very much Daddy's dog and it hurt my heart that John wasn't there to help me make the decision to have him put down, on the other hand I was sorta relieved too, my husband was extremely sensitive and I think the decision would have been so much harder on him than it was for me.
I actually had Taz cremated (most Humane Societies offer this) and my little man (pomeranian, and Tazzy's best buddy) got a tiny vialof ashes for his collar that he still has to this day, and the rest went up into the hills with Dad. It gave me great peace to know that John has his camping, digging, hunting buddy with him forever.
Good luck and peace be with U, U definately made the right decision for YOU and ur beloved pet :)
So, Imagine this. Take your hand it put it on a hot stove, and leave it there. Tie it down if you have to, but don't move. Then imagine your loved ones watching this, and deciding to let you do this because they'd rather see you in pain, then to rescue you from obvious pain. It would be selfish on their part, wouldn't it? And so would you have been if you'd let your dog suffer.
The dog you described was gentle and loving. He wouldn't have wanted to hurt someone, especially you. Yet the pain had driven him insane. It had made him into a vicious creature who'd had to put a muzzle on.
I had to let my mother and husband go. I had to make that decision. And I made the right decision because both of them wanted to enjoy life, but not one of pain. They told me this long before they became sick. I don't feel guilty about my decision at all. I would want someone to do the same for me. I have a living will to make sure that happens.
Two months after my husband passed, our cute little dog got sick. She was having seizures, wouldn't eat. The poor thing was suffering so much, and yet I wanted her with me. She had seen me through some of the best and worst times of my life. But she was ready to be released from her earthly body. I wanted to be selfish. I wanted to keep her. I justified it by saying that I'd just lost my husband. Why should I now lose the only thing I really had left. And so her suffering went on to I finally realized what I was doing. I was being cruel and selfish.
On the day I took her to the vet to be put down, I looked into her eyes and saw that she was ready to go. I had to carry her to the car because she could not walk. As I drove, I sang "Swing low Sweet Chariot" and new she was about to enter Heaven. Yes, I believe dogs do go there.
So, I took her in and the doctor administered the medication. I held her, watching her eyes. At one point her eyes grew large like she was seeing something. She looked happy and then she was gone. I knew then that she'd seen my husband, coming to get his pup back. And now they're together.
You did the most loving, unselfish thing a person could ever do for another.